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Earning money is more important than getting a good education. Do you agree?

Earning money is more important than getting a good education. Do you agree? wByLN
Certainly earning money is very important but is it more important than getting a good education? Nowadays, to have money for a bigger half of the people is more important than to have high education and qualities. They are many examples, young people dropped out high school and go work like waiter or waitress somewhere there are a lot of tourists. Actually, I do not agree with this because when you get a good education, you might have these job opportunities and the choice to work what you like. If you get a good education your work is not hard as if you do not get good education because you work with your brain, this is not the hard physical work if you work as a builder. In my opinion, a lot of young people must study more and work less. Studying has a lot of advantages because everything you know could be important for you. If you have studied in college you will have a good career, you will earn a lot of money, have more free time which you can spend with your favourite people. I expect the things will be better. But on the other hand if you are successful and have a good career, you wouldn't have much free time. I really agree with the idea to get good education is more important than earning money.
Certainly
earning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
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important
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
is it more
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important
than getting a
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good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
? Nowadays, to have
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money
for a bigger half of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
is more
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important
than to have high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
and qualities. They are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
examples, young
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people
dropped out high school and go
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work
like waiter or waitress somewhere there are a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of tourists. Actually, I do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
when you
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get
a
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good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
, you might have these job opportunities and the choice to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
what you like. If you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a
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good
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education
your
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work
is not
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hard
as if you do not
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get
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good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
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because
you
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work
with your brain, this is not the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
physical
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work
if you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
as a builder. In my opinion, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of young
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people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
study more and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
less. Studying has a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of advantages
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
everything you know could be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
for you. If you have studied in college you will have a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
career, you will earn a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
, have more free time which you can spend with your
Possible spelling mistake. 'favourite' is British English.
favourite
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people
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expect
the things will be better.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
on the other hand
if you are successful and have a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
career, you wouldn't have much free time. I
really
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
than earning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
.
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IELTS essay Earning money is more important than getting a good education. Do you agree?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
230 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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