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Today there are many cases of juvenile crime. This is happening because both parents now work. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?

Today there are many cases of juvenile crime. This is happening because both parents now work. with this view? PVQPB
Currently, youth felony is rising in our society. Some individuals claim that the main reason for this is because their parents are not around and spend most of their time working. I deeply disagree with that statement, as I believe there are other reasons for that and jobless adults are terrible role models. First of all, there are several different factors to an adolescent become a criminal. For example, the majority of crimes done by this group is often related to a single mom family where the monthly income is not enough for both to have a reasonable life. In other words, teenagers do not have the proper knowledge and age to apply for meaningful jobs and end up following the easiest and harmful path of crime. Therefore, I disagree that youngsters are breaking the law because both parents have an occupation. Likewise, turning into an outlaw is often linked with the way parents raise their offspring. As an illustration, at such early age humans tend to mimic their tutors in order to learn how to behave in society. For instance, having their role models working will teach them that is part of general life, and only hard work brings fulfilment. Thus, I believe that juveniles look up to their parents and both having an occupation is not a reason to become a felon. In conclusion, I strongly disagree that youngsters are becoming criminals because they are not all the time with their family. I believe that there are others circumstances for this behaviour, such as, money shortage which generally does not happen when both parents work.
Currently
, youth felony is rising in our society.
Some
individuals claim that the main reason for this is
because
their
parents
are not around and spend most of their time working. I
deeply
disagree with that statement, as I believe there are other reasons for that and jobless adults are terrible role models.

First of all
, there are several
different
factors to an adolescent become a criminal.
For example
, the majority of crimes done by this group is
often
related to a single mom family where the monthly income is not
enough
for both to have a reasonable life.
In other words
,
teenagers
do not have the proper knowledge and age to apply for meaningful jobs and
end
up following the easiest and harmful path of crime.
Therefore
, I disagree that youngsters are breaking the law
because
both
parents
have an occupation.

Likewise
, turning into an outlaw is
often
linked with the way
parents
raise their offspring. As an illustration, at such early age humans tend to mimic their tutors in order to learn how to behave in society.
For instance
, having their role models working will teach them
that is
part of general life, and
only
hard
work brings
fulfilment
.
Thus
, I believe that juveniles look up to their
parents
and both having an occupation is not a reason to become a felon.

In conclusion
, I
strongly
disagree that youngsters are becoming criminals
because
they are not all the time with their family. I believe that there are others circumstances for this
behaviour
, such as, money shortage which
generally
does not happen when both
parents
work.
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IELTS essay Today there are many cases of juvenile crime. This is happening because both parents now work. with this view?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
267 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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