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Early technological developments helped ordinary people and changed their lives more than recent developments. To extend do you agree or disagree?

Early technological developments helped ordinary people and changed their lives more than recent developments. To extend PVLBB
From my point of view, every technological development is useful to people in their life. Therefore, I do not agree as I think that early and recent technologies have had an equally significant impact our lives. Many early technologies helped people and changed the way we live. The invention of printing, for example, had a huge impact on the way we communicate knowledge and information. The printing press allowed books and newspapers to be produced quickly and in a large number, which meant that information become. More accessible to many people. The telephone was another early technology that revolutionised communication, allowing people to talk to each other from different locations in over the world. From what I concerned above, I also believe that recent technologies are good assistant for people as they are used to in the past. Depend on telephone, smart phone is created. Nowadays, smart phone can replace a camera, a telephone, an alarm and so on. For example, we just can make a call and hear the voice through telephone, however, with smart phone, we can make a video call, see our relatives lively as we face to face. Beside, inventor made a lot of things that are really necessary in our daily life such as vaccum cleaner, computer. These things reduce the labour and maintain production lines quickly. In conclusion, every technology improve our life and make it easier, both of early and recent technologies have the same position and are updated day by day by the best inventors.
From my point of view, every technological development is useful to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in their life.
Therefore
, I do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
as I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
early
and recent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
have had an
equally
significant impact our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
early
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
the way we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
. The invention of printing,
for example
, had a huge impact on the way we communicate knowledge and information. The printing press
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
books and newspapers to
be produced
quickly
and in a large number, which meant that information become. More accessible to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
telephone
was another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
early
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
that
Possible spelling mistake. 'revolutionised' is British English.
revolutionised
communication, allowing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to talk to each other from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
locations in over the world.

From what I concerned above, I
also
believe that recent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
assistant for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
as they are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to in the past. Depend on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
telephone
, smart phone
is created
. Nowadays, smart phone can replace a camera, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
telephone
, an alarm and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.
For example
, we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a call and hear the voice through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
telephone
,
however
, with smart phone, we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a video call,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
our relatives lively as
Do not use a noun immediately after the pronoun 'we'. Use a verb or an adverb, or possibly some other part of speech.
we face
to face. Beside, inventor made
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
things that are
really
necessary in our daily life such as
Possible spelling mistake found.
vaccum
cleaner, computer. These things
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the
Possible spelling mistake. 'labour' is British English.
labour
and maintain production lines
quickly
.

In conclusion
, every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
our life and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it easier, both of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
early
and recent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
have the same position and
are updated
This phrase is duplicated. You should probably leave only "day by".
day by day by
the best inventors.
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IELTS essay Early technological developments helped ordinary people and changed their lives more than recent developments. To extend

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
253 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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