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Due to development and rapid expansion supermarkets in some countries, many small, local businesses are unable to compete. some people think that the closure of local business will bring about the death of local communities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Due to development and rapid expansion supermarkets in some countries, many small, local businesses are unable to compete. some people think that the closure of local business will bring about the death of local communities. dO5X
It is argued by some that the closing of small scale businesses will cause the demise of local communities because of the rapid growth of supermarkets and the inability of small shops to compete. In my opinion, I agree that the termination of local shops will bring about an end to the local areas. Firstly, many local people cannot afford the prices of goods from these large stores. Secondly, most of these supermarkets are situated far away from rural areas. In the modern society, there are many supermarkets in all the towns and cities. People love to shop in the supermarkets because they are providing more discounts and coupons to customers which attract the people. On the other hand it is more convenient to buy everything in one place which is easy and save a lot of time for the shoppers. In additional they are handling good customer care service. For example, they give customer return policy which we can return damage item. However, Lack of traditional retail stores in a locality may pose some problems for the local population. For instance, People have to travel to the nearest shopping centre to get the items. Which is more expensive and time consuming activity compared to getting the items from local shops. In addition to this, in case of any emergency, when people do not have much time to waste to get the item, lack of local shops may put them in more trouble. For example, if some visitors turn up unexpectedly, the presence of small stores nearby will help people to treat them well. In conclusion, the closure of small businesses will signal the end of local communities because of the high cost of goods from such supermarkets and the far distances created by the building of such large shops. Despite If local businesses are given the right resources to thrive, there will be no need to close their businesses.
It
is argued
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
that the closing of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
scale
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
businesses
will cause the demise of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
communities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the rapid growth of supermarkets and the inability of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
to compete. In my opinion, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that the termination of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
will bring about an
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
areas.
Firstly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
cannot afford the prices of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
from these large stores.
Secondly
, most of these supermarkets
are situated
far away from rural areas.

In the modern society, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
supermarkets in all the towns and cities.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shop
in the supermarkets
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are providing more discounts and coupons to customers which attract the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
On the other hand
it is more convenient to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
everything in one place which is easy and save
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
time for the shoppers. In additional they are handling
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
customer care service.
For example
, they give customer return policy which we can return damage item.

However
, Lack of traditional retail stores in a locality may pose
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
problems for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
population.
For instance
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
travel to the nearest shopping
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the items. Which is more expensive and
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
time consuming
activity compared to getting the items from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
.
In addition
to this, in case of any emergency, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not have much time to waste to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the item, lack of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
may put them in more trouble.
For example
, if
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
visitors turn up
unexpectedly
, the presence of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
stores nearby will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to treat them well.

In conclusion
, the closure of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
businesses
will signal the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
communities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the high cost of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
from such supermarkets and the far distances created by the building of such large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
. Despite If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
businesses
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
the right resources to thrive, there will be no need to close their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
businesses
.
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IELTS essay Due to development and rapid expansion supermarkets in some countries, many small, local businesses are unable to compete. some people think that the closure of local business will bring about the death of local communities.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
320 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
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