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You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: Does Internet need to be controlled by the government? Justify your answer. Write at least 250 words.

: Does Internet need to be controlled by the government? Justify your answer. XneJP
We are in the modern era of digitalization where everything is accessible at the drop of a hat. The internet has become a necessity in the current scenario. There are hardly any households which does not have access to this modern day amenity. But with increasing advancements, there are several cases of cyber-crimes and hacking. I am convinced that internet need to be under government monitoring. The essay will give several points to justify the same. As we know, the benefits of networks but there are number of drawbacks to it. Firstly, there is a possibility that the young are exposed to malicious content which can impede their thoughts. For instance, children at a very young age can come in contact with porn videos which are extremely harmful for them. They might get addicted to the same and get easily distracted from their studies. Secondly, there are increased number of cyber-crimes these days where the pictures are being leaked over the web and leading to cases of blackmailing and abuse. The world of social media is very daunting if not taken under surveillance of the government. Lastly, the video games being played are very commonplace today. In the households, where both the parents are working professionals the child is on his own and it is very likely that he/ she might engage in fatal games such as the blue whale which is reported to cause a lot many deaths. In conclusion, the government should take charge of such a service whose consequences can be deadly if given too much liberty. There shall be norms of providing ID proofs to access the content, this is one of the many ways to protect the youth of the nation.
We are in the modern era of digitalization where everything is accessible at the drop of a hat. The internet has become a necessity in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
scenario. There are hardly any households which does not have access to this modern day amenity.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
with increasing advancements, there are several cases of cyber-crimes and hacking. I
am convinced
that internet need to be under
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
monitoring. The essay will give several points to justify the same.

As we know, the benefits of networks
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
there are number of drawbacks to it.
Firstly
, there is a possibility that the young
are exposed
to malicious content which can impede their thoughts.
For instance
, children at a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
young age can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
in contact with porn videos which are
extremely
harmful for them. They might
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
addicted to the same and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
easily
distracted from their studies.

Secondly
, there
are increased
number of cyber-crimes these
It is better to use 'days' with the time-relative pronoun 'when': "days when". (Alternatively, use 'in/on which')
days where
the pictures are
being leaked
over the web and leading to cases of blackmailing and abuse. The world of social media is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
daunting if not taken under surveillance of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
.

Lastly
, the video games
being played
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
commonplace
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
. In the households, where both the parents are working professionals the child is on his
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
and it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
likely that he/ she might engage in fatal games such as the blue whale which
is reported
to cause a lot
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
deaths.

In conclusion
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should take charge of such a service whose consequences can be deadly if
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
too much liberty. There shall be norms of providing ID proofs to access the content, this is one of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ways to protect the youth of the nation.
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IELTS essay : Does Internet need to be controlled by the government? Justify your answer.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
286 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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