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Do you want to be an independent person? Why? What should you do to become independent every day?

Do you want to be an independent person? Why? What should you do to become independent every day? g8DmD
With the development of technology, humans are Society progresses at such a fast pace. Modern technology can make our life easier. However, one cannot simply rely upon technology to solve every problem. Therefore, becoming an independent person is a basic human requirement. Being independent means your confidence is boosted and you are less reliant on others. And those are also the reasons why I want to be an independent person. To become an independent person, the first thing I solve the problem myself. I gain confidence in your ability to make good decisions and don’t avoid issues. I. Besides, I communicate effectively and get along well with people around me. Being well-informed will keep me from being a follower and will lead to more independent thought. Secondly, coping with loneliness is also the thing I do every day. I don't need a buddy to accomplish every little task or to do any fun activity. I don’t have to wait around for a friend to be available to try that new restaurant in your town or to see that new movie at the theater. This is an important part of being independent because coping with loneliness will keep me from being too reliant on others. To sum up, being independent is a vital skill for people nowadays. Being more independent will give me the freedom to do what I want without caring what others think and it will also lead me to find some original solutions to my problems. Due to those reasons, I always try to be more independent day by day.
With the development of technology, humans are Society progresses at such a
fast
pace. Modern technology can
make
our life easier.
However
, one cannot
simply
rely upon technology to solve every problem.
Therefore
, becoming an
independent
person is a basic human requirement. Being
independent
means your confidence
is boosted
and you are less reliant on others. And those are
also
the reasons why I want to be an
independent
person. To become an
independent
person, the
first
thing I solve the problem myself. I gain confidence in your ability to
make
good
decisions and don’t avoid issues. I.
Besides
, I communicate
effectively
and
get
along well with
people
around me. Being well-informed will
keep
me from being a follower and will lead to more
independent
thought
.
Secondly
, coping with loneliness is
also
the thing I do every day. I don't need a buddy to accomplish every
little
task or to do any fun activity. I don’t
have to
wait around for a friend to be available to try that new restaurant in your town or to
see
that new movie at the theater. This is an
important
part of being
independent
because
coping with loneliness will
keep
me from being too reliant on others. To sum up, being
independent
is a vital
skill
for
people
nowadays. Being more
independent
will give me the freedom to do what I want without caring what others
think
and it will
also
lead me to find
some
original solutions to my problems. Due to those reasons, I always try to be more
independent
day by day.
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IELTS essay Do you want to be an independent person? Why? What should you do to become independent every day?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
262 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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