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Do you think that Private Institutions should be banned? Discuss your options in 250 words.

Do you think that Private Institutions should be banned? Discuss your options in 250 words. 7aYRA
Apropos of this statement, I am in consummate discord with it. Private institutions should not be banned. Because it will mean, abating the choices made by parents for the future of their children. They may not get best education and quality of studies in Government institution. Hence, life for bright students may be downsized. Furthermore, consequences could be devastating for the future of individual and perhaps for the whole nation. On the other hand, there will be huge positive impact on the way our Government Schools work if the private institutions are banned. Once government institutions realize their problems and shortcomings, quality of teaching and code of practice will improve. As the code for conduct improve in the Government institutions, their way of teaching will be more pragmatic. Also there will definitely be profits from schools which will go in Government Treasury once the private institutes are banned; hence the school conditions will improve. These schools will then retrospect the multireligious culture and will teach students to be respectful towards other religions. Parents will definitely benefit from this decision by paying less tuition fees in Government institutions as compared to private institutions. Furthermore, there will be sense of equality between students and there will be exhibit of nor rich or poor in schools. Absence of private schools may become a source of anguish in middle and high income people. It may be misunderstood as a loss in freedom of choice as Government has taken the right of choice form parents for their children education. Some of the children who need special education or attention need private education. For instance, people with disabilities will be cared more in private institutions for their needs as compared with Government Institutions. Similarly, blind or deaf students also need special attention and care which in my option is impossible to provide in Government institutions. In nutshell, I would like to assert the importance of private institutes in our community. Private institutions cater needs for all type of students. They always change their teaching styles and skills in accord to the demand of students, providing them with high stands of education. So I strongly feel that private education should not be banned.
Apropos of this statement, I am in consummate discord with it.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Private
institutions should not be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
banned
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
it will mean, abating the choices made by parents for the future of their children. They may not
A determiner is probably missing here: "get the best".
get best
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
and quality of studies in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
institution
.
Hence
, life for bright
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
may
be downsized
.
Furthermore
, consequences could be devastating for the future of individual and perhaps for the whole nation.
On the other hand
, there will be huge
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
impact on the way our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Schools
work if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
institutions are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
banned
. Once
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
institutions realize their problems and shortcomings, quality of teaching and code of practice will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
. As the code for conduct
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
institutions, their way of teaching will be more pragmatic.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
there will definitely be profits from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
which will go in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
Treasury once the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
institutes are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
banned
;
hence
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
conditions will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
will then retrospect the multireligious culture and will teach
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to be respectful towards other religions. Parents will definitely benefit from this decision by paying less tuition fees in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
institutions as compared to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
institutions.
Furthermore
, there will be sense of equality between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
and there will be
Consider using a past participle here: "exhibited".
exhibit
of nor rich or poor in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
. Absence of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
may become a source of anguish in middle and high income
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
. It may be misunderstood as a loss in freedom of choice as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
has taken the right of choice form parents for their children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
.
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
Some of the
children who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
special
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
or attention
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
.
For instance
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
with disabilities will
be cared
more in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
institutions for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
as compared with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
Institutions.
Similarly
, blind or deaf
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
special attention and care which in my option is impossible to provide in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
institutions. In nutshell, I would like to assert the importance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
institutes in our community.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Private
institutions cater
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
for all type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. They always
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
their teaching styles and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
in accord to the demand of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
, providing them with high stands of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
I
strongly
feel that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
should not be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
banned
.
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IELTS essay Do you think that Private Institutions should be banned? Discuss your options in 250 words.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
366 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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