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Do you agree or disagree with this statement: A good sense of humor is one the most important human's quality. v.2

: A good sense of humor is one the most important human's quality. v. 2
To human, there are a lot of various qualities defined; among them it seems to have a sense of humor is more important for the current societies, in particular. This issue how much this trait is significant for the persons have become a contentious debate among the psychologists and created a quite stir in numerous circles and fields of study. To my perspective, having this sense is underlying because of the its mental influences in the individual' s soul and behavior and In what follows, I delineate my justifications. First, the life is become undoubtedly cumbersome and people never laugh nowadays. Less or more, the populations have become more busy, involved, and overwhelmed in their jobs, and works. In fact, the tremendous obsession never let the people pay attention to the quality of life in the modern time. Suppose, in this case, how much a humorous one can be impressing and effective to change the people' s mood by relating some jocks or making fun of the bitter realities. Second, person with great sense of humor are more positive and energetic to do their works. These kinds of persons are usually encouraged, exhorted, and invited by their friends in the groups. No wonder, everybody wants to have a positive friend who never thinks seriously about problems in front of them and keep moving toward the goals in any hard situations. Let us face with fact; a negatively fretful one can be odious by exacerbating the troubles. Last but not least, some people really are talented in making poke and funny way of talking. Even though this quality can be acquired, it depends on the aptitude and habits of the person that how to connect and find the funny points to relate. All in all, even though there are some sophisticated persons who are against the contention, I reiterate it is consequential to be funny and humorous, as the person with this character is more admirable, lovely, , energetic, and practical in the present time.
To human, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
various qualities defined; among them it seems to have a sense of humor is more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
societies,
in particular
. This issue how much this trait is significant for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
persons
have become a contentious debate among the psychologists and created a
You used an adverb ('quite') instead of an adjective, or a noun ('stir') instead of another adjective.
quite stir
in numerous circles and fields of study. To my perspective, having this sense is underlying
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
A determiner cannot combine with a possessive pronoun. Did you mean simply "its mental" or "the mental"?
the its mental
influences in the
Possible spelling mistake found.
individual&
#039; s soul and behavior and In what follows, I delineate my justifications.

First
, the life
is become
undoubtedly
cumbersome and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
never laugh nowadays. Less or more, the populations have become more busy, involved, and overwhelmed in their jobs, and works. In fact, the tremendous obsession never
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
pay attention to the quality of life in the modern time. Suppose,
in this case
, how much a humorous one can
The verb 'impressing' is a stative verb and sometimes the progressive form is not correct. Try a simple form instead.
be impressing
and effective to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
the
Possible spelling mistake found.
people&
#039; s mood by relating
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
jocks or making fun of the bitter realities.

Second,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
with great sense of humor are more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
and energetic to do their works. These kinds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
persons
are
usually
encouraged, exhorted, and invited by their friends in the groups. No wonder, everybody wants to have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
friend who never
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thinks
seriously
about problems in front of them and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
moving toward the goals in any
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
situations.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Let
us face with fact; a
negatively
fretful one can be odious by exacerbating the troubles.

Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not least,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
really
are talented
in making poke and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
funny
way of talking.
Even though
this quality can
be acquired
, it depends on the aptitude and habits of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
that how to connect and find the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
funny
points to relate.

All in all,
even though
there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
sophisticated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
persons
who are against the contention, I reiterate it is consequential to be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
funny
and humorous, as the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
with this character is more admirable, lovely,
Two consecutive commas
,
energetic, and practical in the present time.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
10Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes
One should not aim at being possible to understand but at being impossible to misunderstand.
Marcus Fabius Quintilian

IELTS essay : A good sense of humor is one the most important human's quality. v. 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
334 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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