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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Life today is easier and more comfortable than it was when your grandparents were children. v.855

Life today is easier and more comfortable than it was when your grandparents were children. v. 855
These days, thanks to development of technology, life is easier and more comfortable than it was in the past. I agree that the most proportion of people from all over the world can overcome to their problems because of using different type of technologies. For instance, transportation was very difficult when my grandparents were children and they could not travel to long distance destinations due to lack of suitable means like cars, airplanes, and trains. While today people can travel very fast by using different kinds of public transportations from north continent to south continent. Furthermore, at that time, people faced with certain dangerous diseases that could not be cured because of lack of knowledge and medicine. In contrast, these days, thanks to improvement of medical science the rate of death is reduced significantly and the most proportion of dangerous diseases are cured by experts. Nowadays, advanced technologies provide people with the golden opportunity to develop their relationship with others who are far from them. By surfing the internet, not only can people make relationship with others, but they also can share their information with them. While in the past few decades, people had to send their letter by postal mail which was very time consuming process and unreliable. Moreover, using the telecommunication technology causes to increasing the level of economic and business scope. Many people can start their own business electronically and make profit virtually which would never happen if they did not have advanced technologies like Internet. Another example is related to developing the scope of entertainment, when children and the youth can take advantages of using different types of hobbies which are based on their group of age. While children in the past decades did not have enough and appropriate entertainment and the area of their hobbies was very small with limitations. These days, children can use the internet and get a lot of useful information about what they want by just searching a keyword. In contrast, in the past few decades, children were straggling with different kinds of limitations in order to finding related data. Publishing the book and article was very time consuming and expensive process while today, the scholars can write the wide variety of books and papers at the short time with lowest cost. In conclusion, I personally believe that the life today is ten times as easy and comfortable as it was in the fifty or sixty years ago. Developing technologies and inventing several tools make the world a better place to live.
These days, thanks to development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
, life is easier and more comfortable than it was in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that the most proportion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from all over the world can overcome to their problems
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
type of technologies.

For instance
, transportation was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
difficult when my grandparents were
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
children and
they could not travel to long distance destinations due to lack of suitable means like cars, airplanes, and trains.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can travel
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
by using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
kinds of public transportations from north continent to south continent.
Furthermore
, at that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
faced with certain
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
diseases that could not
be cured
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of lack of knowledge and medicine.
In contrast
, these days, thanks to improvement of medical science the rate of death is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
significantly
and the most proportion of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
diseases
are cured
by experts.

Nowadays, advanced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with the golden opportunity to develop their relationship with others who are far from them. By surfing the internet, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
relationship with others,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they
also
can share their information with them. While in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
few decades,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
had to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
their letter by postal mail which was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
time consuming
process and unreliable.
Moreover
, using the telecommunication
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
causes to increasing the level of economic and business scope.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
business
electronically
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
profit
virtually
which would never happen if they did not have advanced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
like Internet.

Another example
is related
to developing the scope of entertainment, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
and the youth can take advantages of using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
types of hobbies which
are based
on their group of age. While
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
decades did not have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
and appropriate entertainment and the area of their hobbies was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
with limitations. These days,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the internet and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
useful information about what they want by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
searching a keyword.
In contrast
, in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
few decades,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
were straggling with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
kinds of limitations in order to
Did you mean "find"?
finding
related data. Publishing the book and article was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
time consuming
and expensive process while
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
, the scholars can write the wide variety of books and papers at the short
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with
A determiner is probably missing here: "the lowest".
lowest
cost.

In conclusion
, I
personally
believe that the life
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
is ten
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
as easy and comfortable as it was in the fifty or sixty years ago. Developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
and inventing several tools
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the world a better place to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
30Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes
He who knows no foreign languages know nothing of his own.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

IELTS essay Life today is easier and more comfortable than it was when your grandparents were children. v. 855

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
421 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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