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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Most people can solve important problems in their lives by themselves or with the help of their families. Help from the government is unnecessary. v.820

Most people can solve important problems in their lives by themselves or with the help of their families. Help from the government is unnecessary. v. 820
Nowadays people’s life is more complex and there are some problems which the humans could not find a proper solution by themselves or their families. In these situations, governments established some institutes and organization which have the duty to help and eliminate some hardships of people in a society. Not all people concur when this issue arises. Being cognizant to the logic behind those who repudiate or endorse the legitimacy of this contention, not having any biased perception, I presume that there are some problems which people require to refer some high-grade organizations and government’s institutes. Among a plentitude of reasons in support of this assertion, the government high authority and save time and energy could be picked out for further analysis. To commence with, a consensus has yet to be reached; however, regarding of benefits of laws to facilitate people’s life and organize their interaction with other members of a society, based upon the statistics of different general questionnaires of sundry countries, people are unanimous about the conviction that usual people have a restricted authority and ability to contact with some situation and issues in a society. To elucidate on, when some interactions occur among some people, or they argue about an opposition, it is vital a legal organization intervene in this event and solves the problem. A vivid example can be given to shed light on what was elaborated above. For instance, two years ago our neighbors struggle about the excessive construction of one them and use one meter of his neighbor area. My father wanted to help them for solving their problem but he could not because this issue needed a court to make a fair and just between two persons. They referred to the local court and by exchanging money for this illegal construction the problem solved. In addition to the reason raised above; conserving time and energy could also substantiate the justifiability of the claim made at the outset of this essay. In conjunction with public belief, governments could help people very quickly and with a high performance. Furthermore, people in this era are very busy and they do not have enough time to allocate the others. On the other hand, many people do not have enough experience and ability to solve others’ problems. To delineate, based on these limitations of normal people, governments take the responsibility of solving people’s problems. Thus, people should visit these government’s organizations for gaining better results in the lower time. The result of a study carried out by Rice University’s graduate law’ students revealed that in the 5 years ago up to now on, referring people to government’s places increased about 25 percent in compare with last 10 years before it. These results show the increased complexity and inability to solve their problems by themselves or their family and they induce to refer governments. Drawing upon of the above reason, discreetly put, as far as my perspective personality on the topic is concerned, I reiterate that, there are some problems which force people to refer the government’s organizations and they are unable to solve them. Not only the governments have a prior and higher authority but also they help people to save their times and energy.
Nowadays
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
life is more complex and there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
which the humans could not find a proper solution by themselves or their families. In these situations,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
established
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
institutes and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organization
which have the duty to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
and eliminate
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
hardships of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in a society. Not all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
concur when this issue arises. Being cognizant to the logic behind those who repudiate or endorse the legitimacy of this contention, not having any biased perception, I presume that there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
require to refer
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
high-grade
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organizations
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government’s
institutes. Among a
Possible spelling mistake found.
plentitude
of reasons in support of this assertion, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
high authority and save
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and energy could
be picked
out for
further
analysis.

To commence with, a consensus has
yet
to
be reached
;
however
, regarding of benefits of laws to facilitate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
life and organize their interaction with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
members of a society, based upon the statistics of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
general questionnaires of sundry countries,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are unanimous about the conviction that usual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have a restricted authority and ability to contact with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
situation and issues in a society. To elucidate on, when
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
interactions occur among
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, or they argue about an opposition, it is vital a legal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organization
intervene in this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
event
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solves
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
. A vivid example can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to shed light on what
was elaborated
above.
For instance
, two years ago our neighbors struggle about the excessive construction of one them and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
one meter of his neighbor area. My father wanted to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
them for solving their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
he could not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
this issue needed a court to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fair
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
between two persons. They referred to the local court and by exchanging money for this illegal construction the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
solved.

In addition
to the reason raised above; conserving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and energy could
also
substantiate the
Possible spelling mistake found.
justifiability
of the claim made at the outset of this essay. In conjunction with public belief,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
could
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
quickly
and with a high performance.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in this era are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
busy and
they do not have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to allocate the others. On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
experience and ability to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solve
others’
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
. To delineate, based on these limitations of normal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
take the responsibility of solving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
.
Thus
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should visit these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organizations
for gaining better results in the lower
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. The result of a study carried out by Rice University’s graduate law’ students revealed that in the 5 years ago up to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
on, referring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government’s
places increased about 25 percent in compare with last 10 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
it. These results
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
the increased complexity and inability to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solve
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
by themselves or their
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
family and
they induce to refer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
.

Drawing upon of the above reason,
discreetly
put, as far as my perspective personality on the topic
is concerned
, I reiterate that, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
which force
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to refer the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government’s
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
organizations and
they are unable to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solve
them. Not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
have a prior and higher authority
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to save their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
and energy.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
55Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
With languages, you are at home anywhere.
Edward De Waal

IELTS essay Most people can solve important problems in their lives by themselves or with the help of their families. Help from the government is unnecessary. v. 820

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
537 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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