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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Teachers were more appreciated and valued by society in the past than they are nowadays. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v.335

Teachers were more appreciated and valued by society in the past than they are nowadays. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 335
In this century, most of the people have a busy schedule in a whole day. Some people say that, leisure activities provide a lot of priority in today's and also it is anticipated as a stress relief without a money. Few human believe that, they are turning to a different direction and wastage of valuable period. Therefore, ahead of my opinion and both the views are discussed further. To begin with, numerous human beings spend a more time in office. As a result, their mind becomes very stressful and getting tedious about works. Therefore, they play some games at office time, as having spare time. For example, many industries an organized some outdoor and indoor sports in the year. Also, most of the persons play cricket, football, and others on the weekends. And, these the best ways to fresh themselves. On the other hand, recently technology is more developed in all over the world. So, most of the people sit in front of mobile phone, computer, and so on. For example, nowadays maximum student spends more time in PUBG game. Therefore, they lose their previous time. And, also they do not focus on regular student. To put it in a nutshell, leisure activity is indeed in this era, because, that is very stressed life and it is only one solution to stress-free soul to make. On the flip side, most of the children's are spending on electronic devices, as a result, they waste a crucial time as well as divert from the goal.
In this century, most of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have a busy schedule in a whole day.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
say that, leisure activities provide
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
priority in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's and
also
it
is anticipated
as a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
relief without
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "money".
a money
. Few human believe that, they are turning to a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
direction and wastage of valuable period.
Therefore
, ahead of my opinion and both the views
are discussed
further
.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, numerous human beings spend a more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
in office.
As a result
, their mind becomes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
stressful and getting tedious about works.
Therefore
, they play
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
games at office
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
, as having spare
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
industries an organized
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
outdoor and indoor sports in the year.
Also
, most of the persons play cricket, football,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
and others
on the weekends. And, these the best ways to fresh themselves.

On the other hand
, recently technology is more developed in all over the world.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, most of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
sit in front of mobile phone, computer, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.
For example
, nowadays maximum student spends more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
in PUBG game.
Therefore
, they lose their previous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. And,
also
they do not focus on regular student.

To put it in a nutshell, leisure activity is
indeed
in this era,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
,
that is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stressed
life and it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
one solution to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
-free soul to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
. On the flip side, most of the children's are spending on electronic devices,
as a result
, they waste a crucial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
as well
as divert from the goal.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Teachers were more appreciated and valued by society in the past than they are nowadays. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 335

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
253 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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