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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Please explain youropinion. People should always tell the truth. v.31

Please explain youropinion. People should always tell the truth. v. 31
Some people think that because some children find some subjects such as mathematics and philosophy difficult they ought to be optional instead of compulsory. To what extend do agree? It is claimed by an overwhelming majority of people that as some students have difficulty with learning analysis and reasoning, these subjects should not be obligatory and students should be able to choose what they want to learn. I am of the opinion that although these two subjects are somewhat difficult to learn, this quicken pupil’s mind and help them with thinking deeper when they face complex problems in the future, so it should be mandatory. There is a prominent reason why some students reluctant study scientific and thinking. This is mainly because they consider analytical and thought difficult. For many students numerical and wisdom are complex and very difficult to understand and they need to spend a considerable amount of time on constant practice these two subjects; therefore, they find mathematics and system boring and stressful and this makes them avoid these subjects at every cost. One the other hand, I suppose Mathematics and attitude have a number of very useful benefits to student’s mind and life. First of all, solving mathematics questions develops student’s abilities to reason clearly and logically, taking into account real data and then conclude. Furthermore, Philosophical methods include questioning, critical discussion, rational argument, and systematic presentation, help students to develop their reasoning and analytical thinking. Educators will be able to prepare their minds when they have real problems. Therefor they learn to take any data into consideration, see the possible solutions and relate the data they have to reach the conclusion. In conclusion, it seems to me that analytical and outlook should set in schools’ curricula because of their valuable long-term effects on children’s life.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
children find
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mathematics
and philosophy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
difficult
they ought to be optional
instead
of compulsory. To what
Did you mean the noun "extent"?
extend
do
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
?

It
is claimed
by an overwhelming majority of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
that as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
have difficulty with learning analysis and reasoning, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
should not be obligatory and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should be able to choose what they want to learn. I am of the opinion that although these two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
are somewhat
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
difficult
to learn,
The verb 'quicken' is plural. Did you mean: "this quickens"? Did you use a verb instead of a noun?
this quicken
pupil’s mind and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them with thinking deeper when they face complex problems in the future,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it should be mandatory.

There is a prominent reason why
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
reluctant study scientific and thinking. This is
mainly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they consider analytical and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
difficult
. For
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
numerical and wisdom are complex and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
difficult
to
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
understand and
they need to spend a considerable amount of time on constant practice these two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
;
therefore
, they find
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mathematics
and system boring and stressful and this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
them avoid these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
at every cost.

Did you mean "on"?
One
the other hand, I suppose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Mathematics
and attitude have a number of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
useful benefits to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student’s
mind and life.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, solving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mathematics
questions develops
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student’s
abilities to reason
clearly
and
logically
, taking into account real data and then conclude.
Furthermore
, Philosophical methods include questioning, critical discussion, rational argument, and systematic presentation,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to develop their reasoning and analytical thinking. Educators will be able to prepare their minds when they have real problems. Therefor they learn to take any data into consideration,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the possible solutions and relate the data they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
reach the conclusion.

In conclusion
, it seems to me that analytical and outlook should set in schools’ curricula
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of their valuable long-term effects on children’s life.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
20Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes
The limits of my language are the limits of my world.
Ludwig Wittgenstein

IELTS essay Please explain youropinion. People should always tell the truth. v. 31

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
300 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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