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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It’s never acceptable to interrupt other people when they are talking. v.110

It’s never acceptable to interrupt other people when they are talking. v. 110
These days, the number of species on the verge of extinction is progressively increasing. While some people believe that more funds should be allocated to protect them, others think that the money could be utilized for more pressing issues. This essay will discuss why useful money should not be spent wastefully on endangered breeds. As much as the government is trying its best to look out for endangered species, some people are still of the opinion that enough is not spent in this course. They believe that they have rights to live freely without feeling threatened, even though they cannot speak for themselves. Also, they are very important part of the ecosystem. In zoology department of the University of Lagos, for instance, a proposal was made to the government to allocate 5% of the National budget to protect endangered species. For these reasons they think more money should be spent on them. Conversely, I am of the opinion that human life is paramount to any other thing, and every measure should be taken to assure survival. There are other essential sectors that require funds, such as; health, education and so on. The health and education sector most especially are lagging behind and a lot of lives are lost daily due to the lack of hospitals, equipment and staff. In a study carried out recently it was revealed that over 1000 people die daily as a result of common and treatable diseases. This is to show that focusing more attention on this aspect will increase the life span of humans. In conclusion, the money spent on protecting endangered breeds is just enough for them and attention should be shifted to more pressing issues.
These days, the number of species on the verge of extinction is
progressively
increasing. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that more funds should
be allocated
to protect them, others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
could
be utilized
for more pressing issues. This essay will discuss why useful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
should not be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spent
wastefully
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
endangered
breeds.

As much as the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
is trying its best to look out for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
endangered
species,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are
still
of the opinion that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
is not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spent
in this course. They believe that they have rights to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
freely
without feeling threatened,
even though
they cannot speak for themselves.
Also
, they are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
part of the ecosystem. In zoology department of the University of Lagos,
for instance
, a proposal
was made
to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
to allocate 5% of the National budget to protect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
endangered
species. For these reasons they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
should be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spent
on them.

Conversely
, I am of the opinion that human life is paramount to any other thing, and every measure should
be taken
to assure survival. There are other essential sectors that require funds, such as; health, education and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on. The health and education sector most
especially
are lagging behind and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
are lost
daily due to the lack of hospitals, equipment and staff. In a study carried out recently it
was revealed
that over 1000
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
die
daily
as a result
of common and treatable diseases. This is to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
that focusing more attention on this aspect will increase the life span of humans.

In conclusion
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spent
on protecting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
endangered
breeds is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
for them and attention should
be shifted
to more pressing issues.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay It’s never acceptable to interrupt other people when they are talking. v. 110

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
282 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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