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Do you agree or disagree? It is better to relax through watching a film and reading a book than doing physical exercises? v.192

It is better to relax through watching a film and reading a book than doing physical exercises? v. 192
No one can cast a shadow of doubt on the fact that the enhancement of the complexity of the world and tasks has played a predominant role in exhausting people during the day. They are faced with different challenges; thus they need to spend adequate time to comfort and relax. Not all people can concur when this issue arises. To being cognizant to the logic behind those who repudiate or endorse the legitimacy of this contention, not having any biased perception, I presume that exercising and sports is a more proper way for relaxing than staying at home and do some activities such as reading or watching movies. Among a plentitude of reason in support of this assertion, healthfulness and finding new friend could be picked out for further analysis. To commence with, a consensus has yet to be reached; however, regarding the importance of exercise on human’s health and their lifetime, based upon the statistics of different general questionnaires in sundry countries, people are unanimous about this conviction that today’s life depends on machines and robots. Therefore, people are work in offices with low activities, and they are challenged with out of the maximum amount of sugar and lipids. Exercising give them the chance for being active and regulate their body. A vivid example can be given to shed light on what was elaborated above. The results of a study carried out by Rice university’s graduate students unveiled the fact that about 70 percent of U. S officers in a specific office of tax have the over range weights which decrease their performance and health. In addition to the reason raised above, improvement of friendship and finding new friend could also substantiate the justifiability of the claim made at the outset of this essay. In conjunction with public belief, today' s communications among people are more complicated because of decreasing the trustworthy and reliability in the societies even though humans are social animals; therefore, humankind seeks to find situations for making new friendships such as participating in some group exercises and sports teams. To elucidate on, in exercise people could be familiar with others and their cultures. Furthermore, it helps them to broaden their horizon, and release their stress from exhausting days of work and studying. For instance, I go to the park near my flat and do some exercises. It has a beautiful path for jogging and hiking and I could find to talk with people which make me feel happy and lively. In addition, I could find new friends which are professional basketball players and teach me many things in play in a team. Drawing upon the reasons, discreetly put, as far as my personal perspective on the topic is concerned, I reiterate that people should attend to some sports activities for unwinding and relax instead of staying at home. Not only does exercise increase people’ health but also it helps them to find new friends.
No one can cast a shadow of doubt on the fact that the enhancement of the complexity of the world and tasks has played a predominant role in exhausting
people
during the day. They
are faced
with
different
challenges;
thus
they need to spend adequate time to comfort and relax. Not all
people
can concur when this issue arises. To being cognizant to the logic behind those who repudiate or endorse the legitimacy of this contention, not having any biased perception, I presume that exercising and sports is a more proper way for relaxing than staying at home and do
some
activities such as reading or watching movies. Among a
plentitude
of reason in support of this assertion, healthfulness and finding
new
friend
could
be picked
out for
further
analysis.

To commence with, a consensus has
yet
to
be reached
;
however
, regarding the importance of
exercise
on human’s health and their lifetime, based upon the statistics of
different
general questionnaires in sundry countries,
people
are unanimous about this conviction that
today
’s life depends on machines and robots.
Therefore
,
people
are work in offices with low activities, and they
are challenged
with out
of the maximum amount of sugar and lipids. Exercising give them the chance for being active and regulate their body. A vivid example can be
given
to shed light on what
was elaborated
above. The results of a study carried out by Rice university’s graduate students unveiled the fact that about 70 percent of U. S officers in a specific office of tax have the over range weights which decrease their performance and health.

In addition
to the reason raised above, improvement of friendship and finding
new
friend
could
also
substantiate the
justifiability
of the claim made at the outset of this essay. In conjunction with public belief,
today&
#039; s communications among
people
are more complicated
because
of decreasing the trustworthy and reliability in the societies
even though
humans are social animals;
therefore
, humankind seeks to
find
situations for making
new
friendships such as participating in
some
group
exercises
and sports teams. To elucidate on, in
exercise
people
could be familiar with others and their cultures.
Furthermore
, it
helps
them to broaden their horizon, and release their
stress
from exhausting days of work and studying.
For instance
, I go to the park near my flat and do
some
exercises
. It has a
beautiful
path for jogging and hiking and I could
find
to talk with
people
which
make
me feel happy and lively.
In addition
, I could
find
new
friends
which are professional basketball players and teach me
many
things in play in a team.

Drawing upon the reasons,
discreetly
put, as far as my personal perspective on the topic
is concerned
, I reiterate that
people
should attend to
some
sports activities for unwinding and relax
instead
of staying at home. Not
only
does
exercise
increase
people’
health
but
also
it
helps
them to
find
new
friends
.
17Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
27Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes

IELTS essay It is better to relax through watching a film and reading a book than doing physical exercises? v. 192

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
489 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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