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Do you agree or disagree? Life today is easier and more comfortable than it was when your grandparents were children. Provide examples to support your answer. v.169

Life today is easier and more comfortable than it was when your grandparents were children. Provide examples to support your answer. v. 169
In today’s world, through cellphones we can chat with our family or friends while sitting thousand miles away from them. Earlier it was not used to be like this. Generally speaking, I believe that life today is easier and more comfortable than it was when our grandparents were children. They used to face various problems in their childhood days. Life was difficult and challenging for them in those days. First of all, I think because of medical science life became easier for all of us. For example, in earlier days, when medical science was not very advanced, people used to die because of small diseases like Tuberculosis and Diarrhea. However today, medical science has discovered the cure for most of the dangerous diseases except few. Now a days, we can take care of ourselves in advance by taking different types of medicines, and can avoid diseases. In addition to the importance of medical science advancement, today technology is there to provide support in each and every field. For example, in earlier days, people used to face problems during travelling because of limited commute systems. Now a days, with the help of air transportation, we can fly and can go anywhere in the world. Finally, today we have internet in our workplace and home which was not there in earlier days. With the help of internet, we can connect with our friends and family while sitting home. We don’t need to wait for their mail for a longer time to get to know about their well-being. Because of the advancement in our daily life, almost nothing is difficult for today’s generation. We can find solution of our studies related or other problems on internet. In a nutshell, average people with the amazing technology and better way of communication are living a much easier and comfortable life than it was when my grandparents were children.
In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
today’s
world, through cellphones we can chat with our family or friends while sitting thousand miles away from them.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Earlier
it was not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to be like this.
Generally
speaking, I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
today
is easier and more comfortable than it was when our grandparents were children. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to face various problems in their childhood days.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Life
was difficult and challenging for them in those days.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
became easier for all of us.
For example
, in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earlier
days, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
was not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
advanced,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
die
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
diseases like Tuberculosis and Diarrhea.
However
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
today
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
has discovered the cure for most of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
diseases except few.
Did you mean "nowadays"?
Now a days
, we can take care of ourselves in advance by taking
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
types of medicines, and can avoid diseases.

In addition
to the importance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
advancement,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
today
technology is there to provide support in each and every field.
For example
, in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earlier
days,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to face problems during travelling
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of limited commute systems.
Did you mean "nowadays"?
Now a days
, with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of air transportation, we can
fly
and can go anywhere in the world.

Finally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
today
we have internet in our workplace and home which was not there in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earlier
days. With the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of internet, we can connect with our friends and family while sitting home. We don’t need to wait for their mail for a longer time to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to know about their well-being.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of the advancement in our daily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
, almost nothing is difficult for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
today’s
generation. We can find solution of our studies related or other problems on internet.

In a nutshell, average
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
with the amazing technology and better way of communication are living a much easier and comfortable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
than it was when my grandparents were children.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
23Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Life today is easier and more comfortable than it was when your grandparents were children. Provide examples to support your answer. v. 169

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
313 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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