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Do you age or disagree with the following statement? Children should not hace to work or help with household tasks; their only responsibility should be to study. Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion. v.1

Do you age or disagree with the following statement? Children should not hace to work or help with household tasks; their only responsibility should be to study. Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion. v. 1
Doing sports play a crucial role in the development of every human being and it does not matter whether it is company or individual sport. However, some argue that the benefits of playing individual sports are far more than side sports. In this essay, I will examine the advantages of both types of sports and express my own viewpoint. One of the primary advantages that squad sports can provide with is that in organization sports, you tend to meet a lot of strange people and sometimes spend the day with them. This helps you make more friends. Another benefit of club sports is that it tends to develop good communication skills. For instance, if you have good communications skills, it will be easy for you to keep a friendly relationship with people around you. However, individual sports can also offer some benefits to players. One of the main merits of playing individual sports is that it gives an opportunity of building self-confidence and self-esteem which are important aspects of every player doing individual sports such as tennis or boxing. Also, it makes easy to build a reputation and make more money compared to the squad sports. And the last but not least advantage of playing individual sports is that it facilitates the development of strong mindset and enables you to use your initiative. Having taken everything into consideration, I can say that both types of sports have its own unique advantages. In my view, it should be up to every person to choose and go in for
Doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
play a crucial role in the development of every human being and it does not matter whether it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
argue that the benefits of playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
are far more than side
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
. In this essay, I will examine the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantages
of both types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
and express my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
viewpoint.

One of the primary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantages
that squad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
can provide with is that in organization
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
, you tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
strange
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
spend the day with them. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
more friends. Another benefit of club
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
is that it tends to develop
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
communication
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.
For instance
, if you have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
communications
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
, it will be easy for you to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
a friendly relationship with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
around you.

However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
can
also
offer
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
benefits to players. One of the main merits of playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
is that it gives an opportunity of building self-confidence and self-esteem which are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
aspects of every player doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
such as tennis or boxing.
Also
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
easy to build a reputation and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
more money compared to the squad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
. And the last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not
A determiner is probably missing here: "the least".
least
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantage
of playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
is that it facilitates the development of strong mindset and enables you to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
your initiative.

Having taken everything into consideration, I can say that both types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
have its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
unique
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantages
. In my view, it should be up to every person to choose and go in
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
for
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his own language, that goes to his heart.
Nelson Mandela

IELTS essay Do you age or disagree with the following statement? Children should not hace to work or help with household tasks; their only responsibility should be to study. Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
256 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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