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DO THE SOCIAL MEDIA USAGE ADVANTAGES OUTWEIGH ITS DISADVANTAGES

DO THE SOCIAL MEDIA USAGE ADVANTAGES OUTWEIGH ITS DISADVANTAGES PEG3d
AS TECHNOLOGY HAS DEVELOPED, SOCIAL MEDIA USAGE INCREASED FROM YEAR TO YEAR. PEOPLE CAN NOW UNDERSTAND TECHNOLOGIES AND SOCIAL MEDIA VERY WELL. THESE ALL BENEFITS LEAD TO TECHNOLOGICAL PROGRESS. WHILE THESE BENEFITS ARE GOOD TO SOME EXTENT I WOULD ARGUE THAT DISADVANTAGES ARE MORE SIGNIFICANT. ON THE ONE HAND, USING SOCIAL MEDIA HAS SOME BENEFITS. FIRSTLY, WE CAN COMMUNICATE EASIER AND FASTER. IT IS MORE EXCITING FOR PEOPLE TO USE THESE NETWORKS. PEOPLE CAN FIND AND NECESSARY INFORMATION THAY NEED USING THE INTERNET. ANOTHER BENEFIT SIDE IS IT MAKES PEOPLE FEEL GOOD. FOR EXAMPLE, IF A PERSON IS SAD, THEY CAN EASILY CHAT WITH THEIR FRIENDS USING THIS TECHNOLOGY. ON THE OTHER HAND, I BELIEVE THIS DEVELOPMENT HAS FAR MORE DRAWBACKS. THE FIRST ONE IS THAT SOCIAL MEDIA CAN AFFECT PEOPLE EYE VISION. THESE CAUSE SEVERAL DISEASES AND EVEN A PERSON MAY LOSE THE ABILITY TO SEE. THE SECOND ONE IS THAT SOCIAL MEDIA BREAKS THE RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN PEOPLE. THEY BECAME ENTANGLED IN-NETWORK AND THEY JUST CAN FIND A TIME TO SPEND WITH THEIR FAMILY. THIS ADVERSELY AFFECTS TO THEIR RAPPORT. IN CONCLUSION, I BELIVE DISADVANTAGES OF USING NETWORK OUTWEIGH ITS ADVANTAGES.
AS TECHNOLOGY HAS DEVELOPED,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
SOCIAL
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
MEDIA
USAGE INCREASED FROM YEAR TO YEAR.
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PEOPLE
CAN
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
NOW
UNDERSTAND TECHNOLOGIES AND
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SOCIAL
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MEDIA
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
VERY
WELL. THESE ALL
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BENEFITS
LEAD TO TECHNOLOGICAL PROGRESS. WHILE THESE
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BENEFITS
ARE
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
GOOD
TO
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
SOME
EXTENT I WOULD ARGUE THAT DISADVANTAGES ARE MORE SIGNIFICANT. ON THE ONE HAND, USING
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
SOCIAL
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
MEDIA
HAS
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
SOME
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
BENEFITS
.
FIRSTLY
, WE CAN COMMUNICATE EASIER AND FASTER. IT IS MORE EXCITING FOR
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PEOPLE
TO
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
USE
THESE NETWORKS.
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PEOPLE
CAN FIND AND NECESSARY INFORMATION
Possible spelling mistake found.
THAY
NEED USING THE INTERNET. ANOTHER
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BENEFIT
SIDE IS IT
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
MAKES
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PEOPLE
FEEL
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
GOOD
.
FOR EXAMPLE
, IF A PERSON IS SAD, THEY CAN
EASILY
CHAT WITH THEIR FRIENDS USING THIS TECHNOLOGY.
ON THE OTHER HAND
, I BELIEVE THIS DEVELOPMENT HAS FAR MORE DRAWBACKS. THE
FIRST
ONE IS THAT
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
SOCIAL
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
MEDIA
CAN AFFECT
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
PEOPLE
EYE VISION. THESE CAUSE SEVERAL DISEASES AND EVEN A PERSON MAY LOSE THE ABILITY TO
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
SEE
. THE SECOND ONE IS THAT
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
SOCIAL
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
MEDIA
BREAKS THE RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
PEOPLE
. THEY BECAME ENTANGLED IN-NETWORK AND THEY
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
JUST
CAN FIND A TIME TO SPEND WITH THEIR FAMILY. THIS
ADVERSELY
AFFECTS TO THEIR RAPPORT.
IN CONCLUSION
,
Did you mean "I BELieVE"?
I BELIVE
The pronoun 'I' must be used with a non-third-person form of a verb: "disadvantage"
DISADVANTAGES
OF USING NETWORK OUTWEIGH ITS ADVANTAGES.
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IELTS essay DO THE SOCIAL MEDIA USAGE ADVANTAGES OUTWEIGH ITS DISADVANTAGES

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
192 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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