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Discuss the problem that your country face in the coming 10 years and also state the solutions for the same

Discuss the problem that your country face in the coming 10 years and also state the solutions for the same JBx0
Every country people have face many problem in their daily life. our country India is developing country and people will face a certain problem in upcoming 10 years like on employment poverty etc. and have some of the solution we discuss further. To start with on employment will be main problem in our country because certain industry adopted automation and machinery machine Technology, we have large number of graduate freshers but they have no experience additionally our education system is complicated it does not give sufficient knowledge to students. these problem will be overcome by by improving the education system, syllabus according to job related Information and by provide training to freshers. so, they work in their field and encourage small scale of industry in rural area. To illustrate government provide Loan at a less interest to start a business. To add further, poverty major problem in future because of population is increasing. In rural areas people have lack of knowledge and they live under poverty Line. people have not basic needs for like food, clothes, house etc. That can be tracked by providing basic education compulsory or not mandatory. government should do awareness programme and develop family planning department in village areas. for example around 50% people have no shut. government should provide proper housing facility to these people. To conclude, over population will be major reason for poverty and unemployment in further it can be suggested that not only government but also people are responsible for the sustainable development.
Every
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country
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have
Use past participle here: "faced".
face
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
in their daily life.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
India is developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will face a certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
in upcoming 10 years like on employment
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poverty
etc. and have
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
solution we discuss
further
.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with on employment will be main
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
in our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
certain industry adopted automation and machinery machine Technology, we have large number of graduate freshers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they have no experience
additionally
our education system
is complicated
it does not give sufficient knowledge to students. these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
will
be overcome
Possible typo: you repeated a word
by by
improving the education system, syllabus according to job related Information and by provide training to freshers.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
so
, they work in their field and encourage
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
scale of industry in rural area. To illustrate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
provide Loan at a less interest to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
a business.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
further
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poverty
major
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
in future
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of population is increasing. In rural areas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have lack of
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
knowledge and
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
under
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poverty
Line.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
people
have not basic needs for like food, clothes,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
etc. That can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tracked
by providing basic education compulsory or not mandatory.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
government
should do awareness
Possible spelling mistake. 'programme' is British English.
programme
and develop family planning department in village areas.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
for
example around 50%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have no shut.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
government
should provide proper housing facility to these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

To conclude
, over population will be major reason for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poverty
and unemployment in
further
it can
be suggested
that not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are responsible for the sustainable development.
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IELTS essay Discuss the problem that your country face in the coming 10 years and also state the solutions for the same

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
251 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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