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Disadvantages Of Living In a Bıg City

Disadvantages Of Living In a Bıg City g5jaL
In the old years, most people live in small places like villages. However, after some economical events humanity move big cities, and live urban places. Most of the home landers stay in big cities anymore. For instance, in Turkey, and Japan most percentage of population live metropol cities such as Istanbul and Tokyo. Living in a big city has some disadvantages, for example becoming alone, and bad living quality. First of all, People are losing social skills in huge cities. People live very short spheres, but they have a lot of distance. Moreover, becoming more bigger of huge cities cause raising of anti social behavior. Therefore, there are too much criminal events, such as burgling, stealing and killing. In sum, citizens of big cities are alone and live unsafe area. Secondly, living in big cities gives harm for our health because generally there are a lot of weather, water, and chemical pollution. Moreover, huge places are very crowded, and most people are not clean. Furthermore, big city livers do not find good food. Besides, people who live small places usually eat and drink healthy things. For instance, livers of Kars villages find healthy food easily. For example, good cheese, butter, and milk. To sum, living in a big city is harmful for people's health. To sum up, living in a huge places is bad option for several reasons. In my opinion, people will move small cities after thirty years. It will be excellent decision of citizens.
In the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
years, most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
like villages.
However
, after
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
economical
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "events'" or "event's"?
events
humanity
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
urban
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
. Most of the home
Possible spelling mistake found.
landers
stay in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
anymore.
For instance
, in Turkey, and Japan most percentage of population
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
Possible spelling mistake found.
metropol
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
such as Istanbul and Tokyo.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Living
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
city has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disadvantages,
for example
becoming alone, and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
quality.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
are losing social
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
huge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
short spheres,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
distance.
Moreover
, becoming
Use only "bigger" (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
more bigger
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
huge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
cause raising of
It appears that a hyphen is missing.
anti social
behavior.
Therefore
, there are too much criminal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
, such as burgling, stealing and killing. In sum, citizens of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
are alone and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
unsafe area.

Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
gives harm for our health
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
generally
there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
weather, water, and chemical pollution.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
huge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
crowded, and most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are not clean.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
city livers do not find
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
food.
Besides
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
usually
eat and drink healthy things.
For instance
, livers of
Possible spelling mistake found.
Kars
villages find healthy food
easily
.
For example
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
cheese, butter, and milk. To sum,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
city is harmful for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's health.

To sum up,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
huge
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "place"?
places
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
option for several reasons. In my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
after thirty years. It will be excellent decision of citizens.
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IELTS essay Disadvantages Of Living In a Bıg City

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
246 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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