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Differences between countries become less evident each year. Nowadays, all over the world, people share the same fashions, advertising, brands, eating habits and TV channels. v.4

Differences between countries become less evident each year. Nowadays, all over the world, people share the same fashions, advertising, brands, eating habits and TV channels. v. 4
Differences between nations are becoming less perceptible these days as people all over the world are sharing the same lifestyle, costumes, food, advertisement, and entertainment programs. The following essay discusses the benefits and the drawbacks of this global trend and would reach to a logical conclusion whether advantages outweigh the disadvantages. Due to the globalisation, people share the same fashion styles, commercials, brands and television programs these days and this trend offers some benefits. Firstly, as international brands such as Colgate or Gillette produce products in mass scale, the manufacturing cost of these worldwide products become cheaper. As a result, consumers enjoy the advantage of buying global branded products at an affordable rate. Secondly, as people all over the world share the same culinary experience, it means that people have more diet options nowadays. People who live in big cities such as New York or London would have the option to purchase food based on their appetite, whether it is Chinese, Indian or Western food. Furthermore, this trend would reduce the cultural barrier different nations have and would bring people under a common platform where citizens in a country will have more knowledge and respect about other nations and their customs. On the other hand, many believe that the globalisation of the fashion, entertainment and culinary industries have some negative points. One of the cases is that many people abandon their cultural values these days, as they prefer to follow the world trend. The globalisation also has a negative effect on the identity of a country. Lastly, the foreign television shows have negative influences to the young people, such as violence and unsuitable contents. Many global TV channels are showing programmes which might be prohibited in some cultures. However, as these shows are easily seen nowadays, many young people in those countries are following the style and as a consequence, many of them are adopting a non-acceptable lifestyle. In conclusion, it is true that the globalisation of the fashion, advertising, culinary and entertainment products have their own advantages and disadvantages, but I personally feel that it has more negative points than the positive aspects. I personally believe that we should be selective and be really careful in selecting those global brands and lifestyles.
Differences between nations are becoming less perceptible these days as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
all over the world are sharing the same lifestyle, costumes, food, advertisement, and entertainment programs. The following essay discusses the benefits and the drawbacks of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trend
and would reach to a logical conclusion whether advantages outweigh the disadvantages.

Due to the
Possible spelling mistake. 'globalisation' is British English.
globalisation
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
share the same fashion styles, commercials, brands and television programs these days and this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trend
offers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
benefits.
Firstly
, as international brands such as Colgate or Gillette produce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
in mass scale, the manufacturing cost of these worldwide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
become cheaper.
As a result
, consumers enjoy the advantage of buying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
branded
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
at an affordable rate.
Secondly
, as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
all over the world share the same culinary experience, it means that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have more diet options nowadays.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
cities such as New York or London would have the option to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
food based on their appetite, whether it is Chinese, Indian or Western food.
Furthermore
, this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trend
would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the cultural barrier
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
nations have and would bring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
under a common platform where citizens in a country will have more knowledge and respect about other nations and their customs.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
believe that the
Possible spelling mistake. 'globalisation' is British English.
globalisation
of the fashion, entertainment and culinary industries have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
negative
points. One of the cases is that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
abandon their cultural values these days, as they prefer to follow the world
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trend
. The
Possible spelling mistake. 'globalisation' is British English.
globalisation
also
has a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
negative
effect on the identity of a country.
Lastly
, the foreign television
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
negative
influences to the young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, such as violence and unsuitable contents.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
TV channels are showing
Possible spelling mistake. 'programmes' is British English.
programmes
which might
be prohibited
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cultures.
However
, as these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
are
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
nowadays,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in those countries are following the style and as a consequence,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of them are adopting a non-acceptable lifestyle.

In conclusion
, it is true that the
Possible spelling mistake. 'globalisation' is British English.
globalisation
of the fashion, advertising, culinary and entertainment
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
advantages and disadvantages,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I
personally
feel that it has more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
negative
points than the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
aspects. I
personally
believe that we should be selective and be
really
careful in selecting those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
brands and lifestyles.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
25Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes

IELTS essay Differences between countries become less evident each year. Nowadays, all over the world, people share the same fashions, advertising, brands, eating habits and TV channels. v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
373 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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