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DEVELOPMENTS AND THEIR RESULTS

The growth of communication, technology and transportation has resulted in people having the freedom to work and live anywhere in the World. This event has several advantages and numerous disadvantages. Firstly, the growth of various technologies and transportation has provided people with a huge amount of opportunities to work and settle anywhere in the world. It has revolutionised our life in terms of communication and transportation. The world is closer and more networked together than ever before, leading to devastating barriers and extending settlements in varied areas. Secondly, the modes of transportation have brought about innovations and drastically reduced the time to travel, which has also increased prospects for people to work and travel from one place to another more efficiently and productively. All this has led to better, productive and sophisticated lifestyles. People have gained new knowledge and skills as a result of new technological advances and with the freedom to live and settle anywhere in the world. On the other hand, there are also several disadvantages. This freedom to work and live anywhere in the world attracts people to move from underdeveloped areas to developed areas for a better standard of living. This inflow of population to cities has led to overcrowding, pollution and burden on structure and medical facilities. As a result of this inflow, unemployment will increase since people who come to work and live take native’s jobs from their hand. The fast-paced life has led to problems such as anxiety, stress, and other psychological disorders. This new world has made us less sensitive towards relationships and the emotional needs of others. To conclude, one can safely say that technological advances have helped people by bringing the world closer and allowing people to have the freedom to settle anywhere in the world. This improves the lives of the people and further connects humanity by improving the adaptability of the people and making them more acceptant of each other.
The growth of communication, technology and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
has resulted in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
having the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
anywhere in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
World
. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
event
has several advantages and numerous disadvantages.

Firstly
, the growth of various technologies and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
has provided
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with a huge amount of opportunities to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and settle anywhere in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
. It has
Possible spelling mistake. ‘revolutionised’ is British English.
revolutionised
our life in terms of communication and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
is closer and more networked together than ever
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
, leading to devastating barriers and extending settlements in varied areas.

Secondly
, the modes of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
have brought about innovations and
drastically
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
the time to travel, which has
also
increased prospects for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and travel from one place to another more
efficiently
and
productively
. All this has led to better, productive and sophisticated lifestyles.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
have gained new knowledge and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
as a result
of new technological advances and with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
and settle anywhere in the world.

On the other hand
, there are
also
several disadvantages. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
anywhere in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
attracts
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
from underdeveloped areas to developed areas for a better standard of living. This inflow of population to cities has led to overcrowding, pollution and burden on structure and medical facilities.
As a result
of this inflow, unemployment will increase since
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
take native’s jobs from their hand. The
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
-paced life has led to problems such as anxiety,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
, and other psychological disorders. This new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
has made us less sensitive towards relationships and the emotional needs of others.

To conclude
, one can
safely
say that technological advances have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
by bringing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
closer and allowing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to have the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
to settle anywhere in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improves
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and
further
connects humanity by improving the adaptability of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and making them more
Possible spelling mistake found.
acceptant
of each other.
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IELTS essay DEVELOPMENTS AND THEIR RESULTS

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
322 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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