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Developed countries have created many environmental problems in the world, particularly in their contribution to global warming. Why is global warming a problem? What can be done to reduce the danger of global warming?

Developed countries have created many environmental problems in the world, particularly in their contribution to global warming. Why is global warming a problem? What can be done to reduce the danger of global warming? 7a5qY
Nowadays, ecological issues have become the most popular topic to discuss. There is no doubt that improvement of infrastructure in progressive regions caused many environmental difficulties and one of them is a global warning. Issue as a global warming is a serious threat to humankind and for flora and fauna, because of reasons as high temperature and glaciers melting. However, solutions as filter and rigid government control can prevent hazardous consequences. Firstly, global warming can lead to an immense disaster. In other words, considerable increasing of atmospheric temperature causes the melting of glacier, that can destroy different types of ecosystems. For example, the polar bears and others inhibitors of Antarctic continent may be deprived of their area. Likewise, the temperature of water will change and ocean environment will be eroded. Secondly, the climate change impact on the people heath and may exacerbate cardiovascular and respiratory diseases. The high temperature is harmful to organism and the situation in Europe in 2003 proved it. Because of the hot summer, more than 70000 people died. Therefore, the remaining of familiar conditions should be controlled. On the other hand, there is plethora of different ways and methods that can be used in order to reduce the harmful effect of global warming. The possible solution is to shrink the amount of greenhouse gases, that are mostly produced by factories and transport. To put in another way, people should downgrade the air pollution level. It can be realized by some new legislation, as an obligation of using modern filters and attracting people to take a public transport instead of personal one. For instance, filters will prevent emission of carbon dioxide in the atmosphere, as well as the falling of traffics on the roads. These decisions should be supported by both: citizens and government in order to attain visible changes. To conclude, the breakthrough in industry of developed countries has become the main reason of global warming problem. The vital consequences as degradation of nature and danger to the human health make this issue extremely significant. However, it can be solved by effective application of cleaning devices and modernization of public transport.
Nowadays, ecological issues have become the most popular topic to discuss. There is no doubt that improvement of infrastructure in progressive regions caused
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
environmental difficulties and one of them is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
warning. Issue as a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
warming
is a serious threat to humankind and for flora and fauna,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of reasons as high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
temperature
and glaciers melting.
However
, solutions as filter and rigid
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
control can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
hazardous consequences.

Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
warming
can lead to an immense disaster.
In other words
, considerable increasing of atmospheric
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
temperature
causes the melting of glacier, that can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
types of ecosystems.
For example
, the polar bears
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
and others
inhibitors of Antarctic continent may
be deprived
of their area.
Likewise
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
temperature
of water will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
and ocean environment will
be eroded
.
Secondly
, the climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
impact on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
heath and may exacerbate cardiovascular and respiratory diseases. The high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
temperature
is harmful to organism and the situation in Europe in 2003 proved it.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of the hot summer, more than 70000
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
died
.
Therefore
, the remaining of familiar conditions should
be controlled
.

On the other hand
, there is plethora of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
ways and methods that can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the harmful effect of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
warming
. The possible solution is to shrink the amount of greenhouse gases, that are
mostly
produced by factories and transport. To put in another way,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should downgrade the air pollution level. It can
be realized
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
new legislation, as an obligation of using modern filters and attracting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to take
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "public transport".
a public transport
instead
of personal one.
For instance
, filters will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
emission of carbon dioxide in the atmosphere,
as well
as the falling of traffics on the roads. These decisions should
be supported
by both: citizens and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
in order to attain visible
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
.

To conclude
, the breakthrough in industry of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developed countries
has become the main reason of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
warming
problem. The vital consequences as degradation of nature and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
to the human health
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
this issue
extremely
significant.
However
, it can
be solved
by effective application of cleaning devices and modernization of public transport.
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IELTS essay Developed countries have created many environmental problems in the world, particularly in their contribution to global warming. Why is global warming a problem? What can be done to reduce the danger of global warming?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
355 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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