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describe your birthday party with your friends and your family

describe your birthday party with your friends and your family kbwW2
I will be waliking on air because I will celebrate party for my birthday. I will invite my friends come with me to have fun and play together. I have invited my old friends but they are busy and I am down in the dump. Anyway, my new friends are come to party and my family is beside me. If we do not come to party, I will spend my time to meet them and we will have many unforgettable and have fun together. By the way, in my birthday party I feel the family is one of the most thing in my life. My parents are very love me and they said: "you deserve to be loved" and i fell my parent"s love for me. I was so happy during the party that everyone"s blessing and the cake was blown. I will not forget this everyone"s memories for me. I am so grateful to my friends and family for giving me a mrmorable birthday party
I will be
Possible spelling mistake found.
waliking
on air
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I will celebrate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
party
for my birthday. I will invite my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
with me to have fun and play together.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
have invited my
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they are
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
busy and
I am down in the dump. Anyway, my new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
party
and my family is beside me. If we do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
party
, I will spend my time to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
them and
we will have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
unforgettable and have fun together. By the way,
The usual preposition for "birthdays" is "on". Revise: "on my birthday".
in my birthday
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
party
I feel the family is one of the most thing in my life. My parents are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
me and
they said:
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
you deserve to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
loved
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
and
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
fell my
The double quotation mark seems incorrect here.
parent"s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
for me. I was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
happy during the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
party
that
The double quotation mark seems incorrect here.
everyone"s
blessing and the cake
was blown
. I will not forget this
The double quotation mark seems incorrect here.
everyone"s
memories for me.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
am
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
grateful to my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
and family for giving me a
Possible spelling mistake found.
mrmorable
birthday
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
party
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IELTS essay describe your birthday party with your friends and your family

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
165 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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