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Describe someone in your family who you like

Describe someone in your family who you like B7DxX
The person I like is my father, who I admire most. He is 50 years old. He is a farmer. He works very hard but he smiles all the time. Everybody likes him very much because he has a great sense of humor. My father and I have many similar hobbies. For example, watching TV, listening to music, and enjoying food made by my mother. I love my father because he is the person who I can rely on. In every aspect of my life, my father pushes me to excel. Whenever I feel discouraged, he always encourages me and tries to help me out. When I am with him, I’m not scared of anything. He always cares for every member of our family. He is a very good father as well as a wonderful husband. So, I do admire him.
The person I like is my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
father
, who I admire most. He is 50 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
. He is a farmer.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
He
works
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
he smiles all the time. Everybody likes him
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
much
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
he has a great sense of humor. My
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
father
and I have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
similar hobbies.
For example
, watching TV, listening to music, and enjoying food made by my mother. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
father
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
he is the person who I can rely on. In every aspect of my life, my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
father
pushes me to excel. Whenever I feel discouraged, he always encourages me and tries to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
me out. When I am with him, I’m not scared of anything. He always cares for every member of our family. He is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
father
as well
as a wonderful husband.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, I do admire him.

IELTS essay Describe someone in your family who you like

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
141 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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