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Describe an Interesting Trip You Have Taken

Describe an Interesting Trip You Have Taken Nmx92

I was on vacation last weekend with my friends. We stayed in a beautiful seaside hotel which has a beach so we swam and tanned all day. Being with friends was delightful because we didn't see each other for almost a year. Additionally, I enjoyed my stay there as I had not had a holiday for ages and needed to switch off from my daily routine. My favourite place is a campsite near the Aegean Sea where is close to my hometown. It has stunning sightseeing. One side's color is so green with various shades of the forest, and the other side is blue which is my favorite color.

I was on vacation last weekend with my friends. We stayed in a This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :gorgeousstunning
beautiful
 seaside hotel which has a beach This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:consequently
so
 we swam and tanned all day. Being with friends was delightful This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:due to the factin light of the fact thatowing to the fact that
because
 we didn't This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :witness
see
 each other for almost a year. Additionally
, I enjoyed my stay there as I had not had a holiday for ages and needed to switch off from my daily routine.

My Possible spelling mistake. 'favourite' is British English.favorite
favourite
 place is a campsite near the Aegean Sea where is close to my hometown. It has stunning sightseeing. One side's color is This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:consequently
so
 green with various shades of the forest, and the other side is blue which is my favorite color. 

IELTS essay Describe an Interesting Trip You Have Taken

Essay

American English

2 paragraphs

109 words

This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1

4.0

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
?
One main idea per paragraph
Include an introduction and conclusion
Support main points with an explanation and then an example
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Vary your linking phrases using synonyms

Lexical Resource: 6.0

Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
Check your writing for errors

Task Achievement: 5.5

Answer all parts of the question
?
Present relevant ideas
Fully explain these ideas
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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