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describe an interesting story that you heard or read about in the newsyou should saywhen you heard or read about the storywhat the story was aboutwhy the story was in the newsand explain why you thought the story was interesting v.1

describe an interesting story that you heard or read about in the newsyou should saywhen you heard or read about the storywhat the story was aboutwhy the story was in the newsand explain why you thought the story was interesting v. 1
Wedding is one of the major events where people spend exorbitantly. While many individuals think that these spendings are justified, others oppose the idea. This essay will juxtapose on both these views, and will finally conclude with my opinion. Most of the wealthy people believe that weddings are the place to show one's affluence. Hence, they find it indispensable to invest a hefty amount of money in such celebrations. For instance, Mukesh Ambani, one of the billionaires in India spent almost a thousand crore rupees in his daughter's marriage. Secondly, some people are obligated to spend a lot in these ceremonies due to the pressure of the society. A recent research done in India found that an average middle class man spend almost double the amount of his net worth during such ceremonies because of the pressure from the relatives and social groups. On the contrary, the new trend among the youth has been started to keep these celebrations as simple as possible. Rather, they prefer spending such humongous amount on their future by investing in some property or starting a new business. Such people see it as a waste of money, energy and time. Additionally, this also release the pressure from the person who is burdened to put his hard earned money on big weddings. Thirdly, some people also think that through simple weddings, we are not responsible for any further expectations of others. This means that if a person spends plethora of money in one function, he would be expected to maintain that trend in the future as well. In conclusion, some people think that it is mandatory to spend a hefty amount of money during wedding celebrations to show off your social status and capacity to spend a big amount. However, some people believe in simplicity and think these spendings a waste and think that it is wise to invest such money for a bright future and I completely agree with them as this also releases any kind of social pressure on people who have to invest in such ceremonies.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Wedding
is one of the major
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
exorbitantly
. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
individuals
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that these
Possible spelling mistake found.
spendings
are justified
, others oppose the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
. This essay will juxtapose on both these views, and will
finally
conclude with my opinion.

Most of the wealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weddings
are the place to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
one's affluence.
Hence
, they find it indispensable to invest a hefty
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
in such celebrations.
For instance
, Mukesh
Possible spelling mistake found.
Ambani
, one of the billionaires in India spent almost a thousand crore rupees in his daughter's marriage.
Secondly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are obligated
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
a lot in these ceremonies due to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
of the society. A recent research done in India found that an average middle
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
almost double the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of his net worth during such ceremonies
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
from the relatives and social groups.

On the contrary
, the new trend among the youth has been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
these celebrations as simple as possible.
Rather
, they prefer spending such humongous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
on their future by investing in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
property or starting a new business. Such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
it as a waste of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
, energy and time.
Additionally
, this
also
release the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
from the person who
is burdened
to put his
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
hard earned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weddings
.
Thirdly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that through simple
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weddings
, we are not responsible for any
further
expectations of others. This means that if a person
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spends
plethora of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
in one function, he would be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
to maintain that trend in the future
as well
.

In conclusion
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that it is mandatory to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
a hefty
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
during
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wedding
celebrations to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
off your social status and capacity to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe in simplicity and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
these
Possible spelling mistake found.
spendings
a waste and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that it is wise to invest such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
for a bright future and I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with them as this
also
releases any kind of social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
invest in such ceremonies.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay describe an interesting story that you heard or read about in the newsyou should saywhen you heard or read about the storywhat the story was aboutwhy the story was in the newsand explain why you thought the story was interesting v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
343 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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