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Describe an important festival in your country. When is is? What do people do then?

Describe an important festival in your country. When is is? What do people do then? e8wKW
It is about big festival in my State, it is all time Government and citizen celebrate independent day in seventeen August, a lot of games and interesting prize present to welcome big event. firstly in my state, their made big event for celebrate Independent day with their habit annual year event, however more people come to my state for join with us enjoy it is, also government made more gift for citizen it is time for met much people and we can interaction white their, do not forget white arties come to liven up the event and usually have history exhibition
It is about
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
festival in my State, it is all time
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
and citizen celebrate independent day in seventeen August,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
games and interesting prize present to welcome
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
firstly
in my state, their made
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
for celebrate Independent day with their habit annual year
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
,
however
more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to my state for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
with us enjoy it is,
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
made more gift for citizen it is time for met much
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
people and
we
The word 'interaction' is a noun or an adjective. A verb or adverb is missing or misspelled here, or maybe a comma is missing.
can interaction
white their, do not forget white
Possible spelling mistake found.
arties
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to liven up the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
and
usually
have history
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
exhibition

IELTS essay Describe an important festival in your country. When is is? What do people do then?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
100 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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