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Describe an art/craft activity [painting, woodwork etc.] that you had at school

Describe an art/craft activity [painting, woodwork etc. ] that you had at school RVkgY
Nowadays the subjects of art & craft have grown multifold. Everyday when I travel, I see a lot of wonderful grafitti’s painted on the street and it did remind me of my childhood. So today, I’d take this opportunity to talk about my first successful art creation during my school days. I started learning art when I was Five and I made my first professional painting at the age of 12. Actually, It was a 3D painting of Rocky Mountains which I made for an International School Art competition. The steps in the creation of a painting vary from artist to artist and develop over time. I painted Rocky mountains with the help of plywood board, Clay, water colours, Fabric colours and poster colours. Firstly, I lightly sketch the composition on a canvas, then block in the main areas of colour across the canvas. Secondly, I start with the larger shapes such as mountain cliffs and work toward the smaller ones, gradually working on the detail. Frankly speaking, the painting was breathtaking. It looked as real as if you are actually see the mountain. I was ecstatic after I completed my painting and submitted for the Art contest. The activity boosted my confidence especially when results were declared and I was facilitated me (bestowed) with 1st prize. / i got a first. The next day when I showed it to my teacher and my family, and they were surprised to see beautiful work and really appreciated my efforts. They really stimulated and motivates me to create more things with my own imagination. Since then, I started to participate in every art competition In the end I’d just say that. . Although colours of my first painting have been faded but memories and pleasure remain as it is forever.
Nowadays the subjects of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
& craft have grown
Possible spelling mistake found.
multifold
.
'Everyday' is an adjective. Did you mean "every day"?
Everyday
when I travel, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
wonderful
Possible spelling mistake found.
grafitti
’s painted on the street and it did remind me of my childhood.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
, I’d take this opportunity to talk about my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
first
successful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
creation during my school days.

I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
learning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
when I was Five and I made my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
first
professional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
painting
at the age of 12. Actually, It was a 3D
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
painting
A determiner is probably missing here: "of the Rocky Mountains".
of Rocky Mountains
which I made for an International School
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Art
competition.

The steps in the creation of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
painting
vary from artist to artist and develop over time. I painted
If the term is a proper noun, use initial capitals.
Rocky mountains
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of plywood board, Clay, water
Possible spelling mistake. 'colours' is British English.
colours
, Fabric
Possible spelling mistake. 'colours' is British English.
colours
and poster
Possible spelling mistake. 'colours' is British English.
colours
.
Firstly
, I
lightly
sketch the composition on a canvas, then block in the main areas of
Possible spelling mistake. 'colour' is British English.
colour
across the canvas.

Secondly
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with the larger shapes such as mountain cliffs and work toward the smaller ones,
gradually
working on the detail.
Frankly
speaking, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
painting
was breathtaking. It looked as real as if you are actually
Consider using a past participle here: "seen".
see
the mountain.

I was ecstatic after I completed my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
painting
and submitted for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Art
contest. The activity boosted my confidence
especially
when results were
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
declared and
I
was facilitated
me (bestowed) with 1st prize. /
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
first
. The
next
day when I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
it to my teacher and my family, and they
were surprised
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
work and
really
appreciated my efforts.

They
really
stimulated and motivates me to create more things with my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
imagination. Since then, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to participate in every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
competition

In the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
I’d
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
say that.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Although
Possible spelling mistake. 'colours' is British English.
colours
of my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
first
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
painting
have
been faded
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
memories and pleasure remain as it is forever.
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IELTS essay Describe an art/craft activity [painting, woodwork etc. ] that you had at school

Essay
  American English
7 paragraphs
298 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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