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Describe a party that you enjoyed going to.

Describe a party that you enjoyed going to. NWLwj
Luckily I was invited to a private DJ party last month arranged by one of my college friends. This was a different kind of experience for me. I will describe the event for this cue card topic as it was a great party. The party was organised marking the birthday of Samantha, my bestie in college. We are at the undergraduate level at the American College of Greece. We both share everything between us which has created a strong bond between us, and accordingly, she invited me to this private party. I was amazed at the party arrangement. It began in the evening with light snacks and soft drinks, and then the show started. We took our supper during the DJ show and returned home safe and sound once the event ended. The show was extremely exciting and the invited guests were enjoying the music. I also danced on the rhythm and enjoyed the moments perfectly. The party was held in the garden of Samantha’s house. In fact, she lives in a large villa with her family. Though it was difficult for her to arrange the show in the garden, she managed the permission from her dad after a lot of struggle. Some of her cousins helped to decorate the entire garden which finally looked like a football ground with a round boundary. So, it was really difficult for them to decorate the entire venue. The stage for the DJs was built with the help of outside professionals. The lighting system was unique. The food corner was set in a corner containing different delicious food items and beverages. I liked the arrangement most among the other features of the party because it was the first of its kind for me. A limited number of guests were invited to the party. Before the DJ show begins, Samantha had cut the birthday cake. She stepped 18. The guests present there, including me, sang the traditional birthday song and wished for her very successful in the coming days. Then she distributed the pieces from her birthday cake. Really I have never had such a juicy and delicious birthday cake before. The DJs were not on time. So, the show was late. The people passed their time by gossiping with each other and taking photographs. I think the number of selfies was more than any other thing on that day. However, the DJ show began at around 7. 00 pm. Then the people moved to take seats near the stage. But the majority of them stood before the platform to dance with the music. I went there as I could not manage a seat to sit. I enjoyed everything at the party until the last moment. It was exciting for me. In fact, this was the first experience for me to participate in a DJ party and listen to live music. All of the people invited there were amazing and helped me to dance by showing some steps and moves. I loved the food and drinks. Some of the traditional foods of Greece were ordered (as her mother was unable to cook for this crowd) and we enjoyed them profoundly. The lighting of the venue was breathtaking. Some hidden lights were set that illuminated the entire ground from different parts. Overall, it was the very best experience of a party in my entire life.
Luckily I was
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
invited
to a private DJ
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
party
last month arranged by one of my college friends. This was a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
kind of experience for me. I will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
describe
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
event
for this cue card topic as it was a great party.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
party
was
Possible spelling mistake. 'organised' is British English.
organised
marking the birthday of Samantha, my bestie in college. We are at the undergraduate level at the American College of Greece. We both share everything between us which has created a strong bond between us, and
accordingly
, she
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
invited
me to this private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
party
. I
was amazed
at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
party
arrangement. It began in the evening with light snacks and soft drinks, and then the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
show
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
. We took our supper during the DJ
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
show
and returned home safe and sound once the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
event
ended. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
show
was
extremely
exciting and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
invited
guests were enjoying the music. I
also
danced on the rhythm and enjoyed the moments
perfectly
.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
party
was held
in the garden of Samantha’s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
. In fact, she
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
in a large villa with her family. Though it was difficult for her to arrange the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
show
in the garden, she managed the permission from her dad after
Possible agreement error. The noun struggle seems to be countable; consider using: "a lot of struggles".
a lot of struggle
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
of her cousins
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
to decorate the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
entire
garden which
finally
looked like a football ground with a round boundary.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, it was
really
difficult for them to decorate the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
entire
venue. The stage for the DJs
was built
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of outside professionals. The lighting system was unique.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
corner
was set
in a corner containing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
delicious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
items and beverages. I liked the arrangement most among the other features of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
party
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it was the
first
of its kind for me.

A limited number of guests were
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
invited
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
party
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Before
the DJ
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
show
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begins
, Samantha had
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
the birthday cake. She stepped 18. The guests present there, including me, sang the traditional birthday song and wished for her
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
successful in the coming days. Then she distributed the pieces from her birthday cake.
Really
I have never had such a juicy and delicious birthday cake
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
. The DJs were not on time.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
show
was late. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
passed their time by gossiping with each other and taking photographs. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
the number of selfies was more than any other thing on that day.
However
, the DJ
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
show
began at around 7. 00 pm. Then the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
moved
to take seats near the stage.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
the majority of them stood
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
the platform to dance with the music. I went there as I could not manage a seat to sit.

I enjoyed everything at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
party
until the last moment. It was exciting for me. In fact, this was the
first
experience for me to participate in a DJ
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
party
and listen to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
music.
Consider using "all the".
All of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
invited
there were amazing and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
me to dance by showing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
steps and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
moves
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
loved
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
and drinks.
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
Some of the
traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
of Greece
were ordered
(as her mother was unable to cook for this crowd) and we enjoyed them
profoundly
. The lighting of the venue was breathtaking.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
hidden lights
were set
that illuminated the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
entire
ground from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
parts.
Overall
, it was the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
best experience of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
party
in my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
entire
life.
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IELTS essay Describe a party that you enjoyed going to.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
560 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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