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Describe a change you have made to improve your health and that you would recommend to others.

Describe a change you have made to improve your health and that you would recommend to others. Nymjm
I regularly change my lifestyle to keep my health in the best. And what I want to say is that I tried to get as enough sleep as possible. I read a lot of information on social media that losing sleep will make the body tired, mentally decline and work will also be affected. I used to be someone who was very easy to get into a deep sleep but since only a few times staying up late to work or simply watch a movie, and you know what, I have had a sleep disorder. I have started to adjust my lifestyle by limiting my electronic use to about 2 hours before bed, trying to finish work as early as possible, and going to bed by 11: 30 pm. And you know when you have enough and deep sleep, it helps our bodies stay healthy, our spirits also become better and everything you do the next day also becomes smoother. We don't need to rush, and just step by step everything will work in the right direction. Although I don't really have a healthy problem, or a serious illness, sleep loss makes me prone to stress and psychological instability and unable to do anything. With only 2 months of change, I feel better, and I think today's young people should also adjust their lifestyle to become healthier. And then, sometimes I just stay up late on Saturday night to relax with my favorite movie and go to bed at night. Maintaining the habit of going to bed early as well as waking up early helps me have more time the next day to tackle multiple tasks or enjoy a full day. If I had to choose between taking supplements and getting enough sleep, I would choose to have a regular and adequate sleep. I know that young people will often live to the fullest for their passion or work to earn money, but don't lose your health for this reason. As well as all the things I mentioned, I definitely recommend getting enough sleep.
I
regularly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
my lifestyle to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
my health in the best. And what I want to say is that I tried to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sleep
as possible.

I read
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
information on social media that losing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sleep
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the body tired, mentally decline and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
will
also
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to be someone who was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
easy to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
into a deep
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sleep
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
since
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a few times staying up late to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
or
simply
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
a movie, and you know what, I have had a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sleep
disorder.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to adjust my lifestyle by limiting my electronic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
to about 2 hours
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bed
, trying to finish
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
as early as possible, and going to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bed
by 11: 30 pm. And you know when you have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
enough
and deep
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sleep
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
our bodies stay healthy, our spirits
also
become better and everything you do the
next
day
also
becomes smoother.

We don't need to rush, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
step by step everything will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in the right direction. Although I don't
really
have a healthy problem, or a serious illness,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sleep
loss
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
me prone to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
and psychological instability and unable to do anything. With
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
2 months of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
, I feel better, and I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
should
also
adjust their lifestyle to become healthier.

And then,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
I
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
stay up late on Saturday night to relax with my favorite movie and go to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bed
at night. Maintaining the habit of going to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bed
early
as well
as waking up early
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
me have more time the
next
day to tackle multiple tasks or enjoy a full day. If I had to choose between taking supplements and getting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sleep
, I would choose to have a regular and adequate sleep.

I know that young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
will
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
to the fullest for their passion or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
to earn money,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
don't lose your health
for this reason
.
As well
as all the things I mentioned, I definitely recommend getting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sleep
.
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IELTS essay Describe a change you have made to improve your health and that you would recommend to others.

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
344 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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