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Decribe an activity after college.

Decribe an activity after college. r15Ko
I do some activities after my college. Although, i don't have sufficient time to do extra  curriculum activities  due to study work but i do some outdoor activities. My college time is in the morning that's why i don't have adequate time to do exercise so two years ago, I decided to do exercise at evening time with my friend her name is khyati and also She is my neighbor. However, i am very health conscience person so i never skip exercise even one day. everyday i  go in gym it name is perfect body gym which is near about my house. So Me and my friend daily go there and every day do     exercise approximately 2 hr. Furthermore, after doing exercise we walk on pavement. I do many distinguish sorts of activities like indoor cycling, pushups and dumbbell row, etc.   I do these types of activities with vigilance because sometimes we do not with proper way then it's become harmful effect on health. Firstly when i commenced exercise that time i feel very tired and my whole body was in pain but i adamant with my decision. Eventually, after passes some day i feel better  doing exercise. consequently,   it's effective result on my body. Now It has become a part of my routine and if I do miss it that than i feel very guilty.
I do
some
activities
after my college. Although,
i
don't have sufficient
time
to do extra
 
curriculum activities
 
due to study work
but
i
do
some
outdoor
activities
. My college
time
is in the morning that's why
i
don't have adequate
time
to do
exercise
so
two years ago, I decided to do
exercise
at evening
time
with my friend her name is
khyati
and
also
She is my neighbor.
However
,
i
am
very
health conscience person
so
i
never skip
exercise
even one day.
everyday
i
 
go in gym it
name
is perfect body gym which is near about my
house
.
So
Me and my friend daily go there and every day do
    
exercise
approximately 2 hr.
Furthermore
, after doing
exercise
we walk on pavement. I do
many
distinguish sorts of
activities
like indoor cycling,
pushups
and dumbbell row, etc.
 
I do these types of
activities
with vigilance
because
sometimes
we do not with proper way then it's become harmful effect on health.
Firstly
when
i
commenced
exercise
that
time
i
feel
very
tired and my whole body was in pain
but
i adamant with my decision.
Eventually
, after passes
some
day
i
feel better
 
doing
exercise
.
consequently
,
 
it's effective result
on my body.
Now
It has become a part of my routine and if I do miss it that than
i
feel
very
guilty.
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IELTS essay Decribe an activity after college.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
228 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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