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Currently, a number of undergraduates experience many troubles of applying for jobs. One of those problems, which is difficult to deal with, is which jobs would they choose between “the job that they like and are skilled at but doesn’t offer a good salary” and “another job that offer a good salary and benefits but they dislike and are not skilled at”. We are also included. Therefore, this essay will discuss about which job we will choose.

Currently, a number of undergraduates experience many troubles of applying for jobs. One of those problems, which is difficult to deal with, is which jobs would they choose between “the job that they like and are skilled at but doesn’t offer a good salary” and “another job that offer a good salary and benefits but they dislike and are not skilled at”. We are also included. Therefore, this essay will discuss about which job we will choose. 3LxVY
Currently, a number of undergraduates experience many troubles of applying for jobs. One of those problems, which is difficult to deal with, is which jobs would they choose between “the job that they like and are skilled at but doesn’t offer a good salary” and “another job that offer a good salary and benefits but they dislike and are not skilled at”. We are also included. Therefore, this essay will discuss about which job we will choose. There are several plus point of working in the company that we are specialize but cheap salary. First of all, it is good for the company when employers are able to use their strength efficiently. This leads to quality projects. Secondly, if we interested in it, we will always improve and develop skills even it is challenging. Another positive aspect is when we work on which job we like, we can actually do it in long term without any boring or burn out. However, in this case, the cheap salary also has a weakness which leads to financial problems. Turning to cooperation in the company which offers an excellent salary but we dislike. There are many disadvantages of working. Beginning with if we are not skilled at those jobs, we have to spend more time on learning it such as upskill in those fields. Of course, if we work in a job which we do not prefer, it will make us lack of motivation and inspiration of working. Furthermore, it affects us to handle this job not enough. Although it has many drawbacks, it also has a benefit. For example, we will not have any financials issues because of the great salary. In conclusion, working in the company which we are specialize but cheap salary has much more advantages than working in the company which offers an excellent salary but we dislike. Consequently, we prefer the first company which we like it.
Currently
, a number of undergraduates experience
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
troubles of applying for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
. One of those problems, which is difficult to deal with, is which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
would they choose between “the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
that they like and
are skilled
at
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
doesn’t
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
offer
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary”
and “another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
offer
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
and benefits
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they dislike and are not skilled at”. We are
also
included.
Therefore
, this essay will
Did you mean simply "discuss which"? You do not need the word "about" here.
discuss about which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
we will choose.

There are several plus point of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
that we are
Consider using a past participle here: "specialized".
specialize
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cheap
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
when employers are able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
their strength
efficiently
. This leads to quality projects.
Secondly
, if we interested in it, we will always
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
and develop
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
even it is challenging. Another
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
aspect is when we work on which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
we like, we can actually do it in long term without any boring or burn out.
However
,
in this case
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cheap
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
also
has a weakness which leads to financial problems.

Turning to cooperation in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
offers
an excellent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
we dislike. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
disadvantages of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
. Beginning with if we are not skilled at those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
, we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
spend more time on learning it such as upskill in those fields.
Of course
, if we work in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
which we do not prefer, it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
us lack of motivation and inspiration of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
.
Furthermore
, it affects us to handle this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
. Although it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
drawbacks, it
also
has a benefit.
For example
, we will not have any financials issues
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the great salary.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
which we are
Consider using a past participle here: "specialized".
specialize
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cheap
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
has much more advantages than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
offers
an excellent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
we dislike.
Consequently
, we prefer the
first
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
which we like it.
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IELTS essay Currently, a number of undergraduates experience many troubles of applying for jobs. One of those problems, which is difficult to deal with, is which jobs would they choose between “the job that they like and are skilled at but doesn’t offer a good salary” and “another job that offer a good salary and benefits but they dislike and are not skilled at”. We are also included. Therefore, this essay will discuss about which job we will choose.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
319 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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