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Culture is turning similar around the world. What are the reasons. What are the positive and negative aspects.

Culture is turning similar around the world. What are the reasons. What are the positive and negative aspects. aMgV
We live in an age where many of us have different cultures and traditions, which are getting kind of similar when compared to the cultures around the world and the reasons could be many. Firstly we would not be aware be of the cultures around the world, if we haven't experienced travelling around the world. So this brings us to a positive notion of travelling. Travelling to different countries gives us an understanding on how do people deal with their living conditions and different traditions they follow in terms of their religious practices. For example people are more into Western culture nowadays. People are turning modern in their thinking when it comes to fashion and gender equality, the pros of this is leading to better future for women especially in terms of their education and rights from the government to face the social evils of the society. In my opinion the negative effects on cultures being similar around the world is that the certain countries like India are blindly following the ways of the west, which in turn drives them away from their own inherited culture. The main cause for this is globalisation, for example people never pursued too hard to make their living in the metro cities during the 90's in india. All this changes started reflecting in each one's personal life as well, children starting to live away from parents which in turn demoralised the values passed on by previous generations. All things considered, I would say there is always a pro and a con in every culture, matters how we take it.
We
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in an age where
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of us have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
and traditions, which are getting kind of similar when compared to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
around
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
and the reasons could be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
.

Firstly
we would not be aware be of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
around
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
, if we haven't experienced travelling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
around
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
this brings us to a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
notion of travelling. Travelling to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
countries gives us an understanding on how do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
deal with their living conditions and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
traditions they follow in terms of their religious practices.
For example
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are more into Western
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
nowadays.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
are turning modern in their thinking when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to fashion and gender equality, the pros of this is leading to better future for women
especially
in terms of their education and rights from the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
to face the social evils of the society.

In my opinion the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
being similar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
around
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
is that the certain countries like India are
blindly
following the ways of the west, which in turn drives them away from their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
inherited
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
. The main cause for this is
Possible spelling mistake. 'globalisation' is British English.
globalisation
,
for example
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
never pursued too
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their living in the metro cities during the
Apostrophes aren't needed for decades: "90s".
90's
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
india
. All this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
reflecting in each one's personal life
as well
, children starting to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
away from parents which in turn
Possible spelling mistake. 'demoralised' is British English.
demoralised
the values passed on by previous generations.

All things considered, I would say there is always a pro and a con in every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
, matters how we take it.
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IELTS essay Culture is turning similar around the world. What are the reasons. What are the positive and negative aspects.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
265 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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