Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Some people think that children should begin their formal education as a very early age .some think they should begin at least 7 year old ,some think they should begin at

Some people think that children should begin their formal education as a very early age. some think they should begin at least 7 year old, some think they should begin at xjL6
School is the vital factor of everyone's life. In modern world some people believe that schooling started at early age but others think children should be free at the age of seven. In my perspective kids must start the school as early because they can get more benefits from school that will help to shape their future. In this essay we discuss about this topic. Early age of schooling can help to improve the social bonding. Once children can start the school, they can more or less an equal environment, where they must communicate with older and younger children, they compromise when playing, start to learn from their teachers and forming stable bonds biased on sympathy and also shared interests with others, this can help to improve their social interaction, moreover in school teachers are the paramount factor, they always lead the kids in a straight forward way, apart from this early age children can get more chance to mingle with peer group, that also could develop the sharing mentality and other good behaviors. On the other hand, home is the first learning platform of every child and the parents are the primary teachers. According the research in to the child psychology, children forming their personality at the age of 4 and 7, so in this valuable time they must under care of their father and mother, because in order to the school education may be the chance of misleading by the peer group. To conclude, starting school at the early stage of childhood can help to social bonding, however parents are also take the responsibility to develop the personality of kids.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
School
is the vital factor of everyone's life. In modern world
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that schooling
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
early
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should be free at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
of seven. In my perspective kids
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
early
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more benefits from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
that will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
to shape their future.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
In
this essay we
Did you mean simply "discuss this"? You do not need the word "about" here.
discuss about this
topic.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Early
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
of schooling can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the social bonding. Once
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
, they can more or less an equal environment, where they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
communicate with older and younger
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
, they compromise when playing,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to learn from their teachers and forming stable bonds biased on sympathy and
also
shared interests with others, this can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their social interaction,
moreover
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
teachers are the paramount factor, they always lead the kids in a straight forward way, apart from this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
early
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more chance to mingle with peer group, that
also
could develop the sharing mentality and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
behaviors. On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, home is the
first
learning platform of every child and the parents are the primary teachers.
It appears that a preposition is missing after 'According'.
According the
research in to the child psychology,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
forming their personality at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
of 4 and 7,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
in this valuable time they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
under care of their father and mother,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
in order to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
education may be the chance of misleading by the peer group.
To conclude
, starting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
early
stage of childhood can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
to social bonding,
however
parents are
also
Consider using a past participle here: "taken".
take
the responsibility to develop the personality of kids.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay Some people think that children should begin their formal education as a very early age. some think they should begin at least 7 year old, some think they should begin at

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
272 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts