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Culture and galleries online

Culture and galleries online nVYYn
To commence with, people will have an access to everything by just one click in the future and won't have to go through so much effort. I completely  agree  with that. I will elucidate my view point with following arguments. One nuance that should be taken into consideration when it comes to this debate question is the fact that, technology will bring us comfort. Come across odd looking pictures that people do not have a limit  to touch them isn't enjoyable at all and it's  time consuming hence people can easily search about them and utilize  the features of the online museum like online tour about the history and culture and galleries and art exhibit in future provide persons by a website that you can purchase any item in a few moments whereas the process of purchasing  is very simple  as people  can pay thorough online banking which is very convenient and about schools there will be a new method  of learning which is distance learning furthermore, the communication between teacher and student will be limited. In this case although there are less teacher-student interaction but its benefits out weight it's drawbacks like it's economically efficent and less expenses for students. under graduate can gain a new skill and accumulate their knowledge and libraries will be the online bank as people can lookeup the new and complex words immediately. Consequently, with high-tech innovations people will be more reliant on their phones and social media.
To commence with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will have
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "access".
an access
to everything by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
one click in the future and won't
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
go through
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
much effort. I completely
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
with that. I will elucidate my view point with following arguments.

One nuance that should
be taken
into consideration when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to this debate question is the fact that, technology will bring us comfort.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Come
across odd looking pictures that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not have a limit
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
to touch them isn't enjoyable at all and it's
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
time consuming
hence
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
easily
search about them and utilize
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
the features of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
museum like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
tour about the history and culture and galleries and art exhibit in future provide persons by a website that you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
any item in a few moments whereas the process of purchasing
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
simple
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
can pay thorough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
banking which is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
convenient and about schools there will be a new method
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
of learning which is distance learning
furthermore
, the communication between teacher and student will
be limited
.
In this case
although there are less teacher-student interaction
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
its benefits out weight it's drawbacks like it's
economically
Possible spelling mistake found.
efficent
and
Did you mean "fewer"? The noun expenses is countable.
less
expenses for students.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
under
graduate can gain a new
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
and accumulate their knowledge and libraries will be the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
bank as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
Possible spelling mistake found.
lookeup
the new and complex words immediately.

Consequently
, with high-tech innovations
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will be more reliant on their phones and social media.
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IELTS essay Culture and galleries online

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
244 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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