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Crime rate nowadays is decreasing as to compared to past because of technology advancement. Do yo agree or disagree?

Crime rate nowadays is decreasing as to compared to past because of technology advancement. Do yo agree or disagree? QLRj9
is no any doubt that in present scenario crime ratio has reduce as compare to early years. Because, government more public tax fund to spend on security and use to technology for decline the criminals activity. I agree with this statement and discuss both point of view. On the one hand, there are number of stunning benefits of decreasing crime rates. These include enchanced footprint machine, lie detective, high tech cameras. Firstly, government and private firms installed the CCTV camera around the society, with the helpful for copes to catch the criminals easily and sometimes prevent the crime. Moreover, law enforcement and authority a makes the strictly rules and regulation for this reason people more scared to doing the violence in public spot. For instance, in the global more nations but, the one of the country in Dubai inside 0 percent crime rates. Thus, where if individual try to steal the car then, automatic sensor on car slow and lock the gate. On the other hand, there are couple of drawbacks of the technology. Secondly, people more depends on technology for this reason who culprit find out the new way to do the crime by through computer, cellphone. Additionally, they mind machine through hack the websites, with to steal the significant information and data which sell to others person. Furthermore, lawbreaker cell phone along with sit at home to do the ease fraud with hide to own original identity after that online withdrawal the money from bank without any trouble. In conclude, it can be seen that whereas the technology has brought some disadvantages in terms of waste money, hacking, cyber crime, it's advantage such as people feel more secure in moder era than formal.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
is
Did you mean "now" (=at this moment) instead of 'no' (negation)?
no
any doubt that in present scenario
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
ratio has
Use past participle here: "reduced".
reduce
as compare to early years.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
more public tax fund to spend on security and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
for decline the
Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean "criminals'" or "criminal's"?
criminals
activity. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this statement and discuss both point of view.

On the one hand, there are number of stunning benefits of decreasing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
rates. These include
Possible spelling mistake found.
enchanced
footprint machine, lie detective, high tech cameras.
Firstly
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
and private firms installed the CCTV camera around the society, with the helpful for copes to catch the criminals
easily
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
.
Moreover
, law enforcement and authority a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
the
strictly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and regulation
for this reason
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
more scared to doing the violence in public spot.
For instance
, in the global more nations
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
, the one of the country in Dubai inside 0 percent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
rates.
Thus
, where if individual try to steal the car then, automatic sensor on car slow and lock the gate.

On the other hand
, there are
It seems that an article is missing.
couple of
drawbacks of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
.
Secondly
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
more depends on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
for this reason
A noun should not follow 'who'. Try changing to a verb or maybe to "who is a culprit".
who culprit
find out the new way to do the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
by through computer, cellphone.
Additionally
, they mind machine through hack the websites, with to steal the significant information and data which sell to others person.
Furthermore
, lawbreaker cell phone along with sit at home to do the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
fraud with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hide
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
original identity after that online withdrawal the money from bank without any trouble.

In conclude, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that whereas the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
has brought
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disadvantages in terms of waste money, hacking, cyber
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
, it's advantage such as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
feel more secure in
Possible spelling mistake found.
moder
era than formal.
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IELTS essay Crime rate nowadays is decreasing as to compared to past because of technology advancement. Do yo agree or disagree?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
285 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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