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countries imposed a curfew in particular for the teenagers

countries imposed a curfew in particular for the teenagers EdDAM
These days countries imposed a curfew in particular for the teenagers while some people believe that this is the best way to reduce the danger of the teens, while others thinks that this makes their life tough and it is incorrect decision. This essay will discuss both side and will draw my personal conclusion. In one hand, people say that they should live their life, and they could choose their own way, and they can make their personal decision. Such as, going out in midnight or entering a night clubs. So, that way some assume that it is normal, in addition that they are huge abundance to depends on their self and do what ever they see that it is right. On the other hand, other community might feel that it is risky to leave the teenagers to a late time outside, consequently they should put for them a limit. To illustrate, a number of people see that it is not admissible to go out after 8pm for teenagers consequently they decided to put a curfew for their children, this due to the fact that they are warried about them and they could not trust the community outside, they might effect their children. In addition, allowing teens being out in the night will affect their sleep so it will cause them to fall in several field. For an instance, in school or in general life, they will be less progressive. In conclusion, after a careful analysis of both point veiw, I believe that curfew is essential for teens to reduce being in risk. In my personal point I suggest that teenagers must focus their future and build their future. Finally, curfew has been used to make youngers safe and it is supporting their benefits.
These days countries imposed a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
curfew
in particular
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teenagers
while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that this is the best way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
of the teens, while others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thinks
that this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
their life tough and it is incorrect decision. This essay will discuss both side and will draw my personal conclusion.

In one hand,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
say that they should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
their life, and they could choose their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
way, and they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their personal decision. Such as, going out in midnight or entering a night clubs.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, that way
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
assume that it is normal,
in addition
that they are huge abundance to depends on their self and do what ever they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that it is right.

On the other hand
, other community might feel that it is risky to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teenagers
to a late time outside,
consequently
they should put for them a limit. To illustrate, a number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that it is not admissible to go out after 8pm for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teenagers
consequently
they decided to put a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
curfew
for their children, this due to the fact that they are
Possible spelling mistake found.
warried
about
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
them and
they could not trust the community outside, they might
Did you mean "affect"?
effect
their children.

In addition
, allowing teens being out in the night will affect their sleep
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it will cause them to fall in
Possible agreement error. The noun field seems to be countable; consider using: "several fields".
several field
. For an instance, in school or
in general
life, they will be less progressive.

In conclusion
, after a careful analysis of both point
Possible spelling mistake found.
veiw
, I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
curfew
is essential for teens to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
being in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
. In my personal point I suggest that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teenagers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
focus their future and build their future.
Finally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
curfew
has been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
Possible spelling mistake found.
youngers
safe and it is supporting their benefits.
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IELTS essay countries imposed a curfew in particular for the teenagers

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
294 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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