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Convenience food will become increasingly prevalent and eventually replace traditional foods and traditional methods of food preparation. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? v.2

Convenience food will become increasingly prevalent and eventually replace traditional foods and traditional methods of food preparation. with this opinion? v. 2
Some people have predicted that the increasing popularity of convenience food could finally supplant traditional cuisine and traditional methods of food preparation. Personally, I completely disagree with this view. For a variety of reasons, it would be wrong to replace traditional foods with convenience ones. Firstly, convenience foods are definitely bad for humans physically because of great amount of sugar, carbohydrate or saturated fat and insufficiency of vitamins or mineral contents. Secondly, these unhealthy foods would lead to serious health problems, for instance obesity, diabetes, hypertension or strokes if we consumed regularly. In fact, people who eat pre-packed food daily tend to lose control of their weight and get cardiovascular disease easier than those who rarely consumed these foods. Finally, there are allergenic ingredients such as corn, wheat, rice or oats in each pack of these foods. Apart from the practical concerns expressed above, I strongly believe that convenience foods can not replace traditional ones because of their adverse impacts on environment. Most packagings are made from plastic, which is one of the most persistent fuels. This will result in the increasing of waste and negatively affect oceans, lands and creatures. For example, there are tons of waste from packagings releasing into our planet annually, floating on the water, polluting the land. Moreover, traditional foods are crucial aspect of culture and social life. And important celebrations such as Christmas, Thanksgiving and Lunar New Year are significant by traditional methods of food preparation In conclusion, the replacement of processed foods should be based on demerit, and I believe that it would be impractical to change our eating habits.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have predicted that the increasing popularity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
convenience
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
could
finally
supplant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
cuisine and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
methods of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
preparation.
Personally
, I completely disagree with this view.

For a variety of reasons, it would be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
to replace
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
convenience
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
convenience
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
are definitely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
for humans
physically
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of great amount of sugar, carbohydrate or saturated
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fat
and insufficiency of vitamins or mineral contents.
Secondly
, these unhealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
would lead to serious health problems,
for instance
obesity, diabetes, hypertension or strokes if we consumed
regularly
. In fact,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who eat
Possible spelling mistake found.
pre-packed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
daily tend to lose control of their weight and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
cardiovascular disease easier than those who rarely consumed these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
.
Finally
, there are allergenic ingredients such as corn, wheat, rice or oats in each pack of these foods.

Apart from the practical concerns expressed above, I
strongly
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
convenience
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
can not replace
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of their adverse impacts on environment. Most
Possible spelling mistake found.
packagings
are made
from plastic, which is one of the most persistent fuels. This will result in the increasing of waste and
negatively
affect oceans, lands and creatures.
For example
, there are tons of waste from
Possible spelling mistake found.
packagings
releasing into our planet
annually
, floating on the water, polluting the land.

Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
are crucial aspect of culture and social life. And
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
celebrations such as Christmas, Thanksgiving and Lunar New Year are significant by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
methods of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
preparation

In conclusion
, the replacement of processed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
should
be based
on demerit, and I believe that it would be impractical to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
our eating habits.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
23Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Convenience food will become increasingly prevalent and eventually replace traditional foods and traditional methods of food preparation. with this opinion? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
267 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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