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Consider a situation where you are asked by your supervisor to work with one of your co-workers on a project. This co-worker has opinions that are very different than yours. Moreover, they feel very strongly about these opinions. Do you think this is a go v.1

Consider a situation where you are asked by your supervisor to work with one of your co-workers on a project. This co-worker has opinions that are very different than yours. Moreover, they feel very strongly about these opinions. Do you think this is a go v. 1
Despite students being rich or poor, they are unable to crack accessibility into universities. Even though some people disagree with the statement above, there were many reasons in order to agree. Not only knowledge plays a vital role for grabbing access into university, but also a high educational-fee takes a major part of it such as the costly schools, wealthy areas. While students are enough talented to get admitted into the public institutions, they find it difficult to reach the level that these universities are expecting. First of all it is clear that the entrance tests are indispensable to get an access, so people are unable to crack these tests; however, these universities would ask for the higher grades in their bachelor's degree before writing the entrance test, which is unexpectedly high. An initial analysis would be reaching the university expected levels in terms of grades because it is calculated as a priority. Turning to the entrance tests, this is the pre-entrance test in order to get an admission into the college. While these points seem to be convincing, there is one more persuasive topic to cover. On the other hand, the cost of the study is also an essential component for reaching the destination, but neither the rich or poor were unable to afford these universities. Even though there were business tycoons in our society, they were still not ready to purchase the knowledge from these universities; however impoverish can't even think about these institutions. Moreover, there are many societies, which are of cheaper cost and free, these universities are under ranked in the world; for example, some public universities in certain countries offer free of education, and ready to take students from all over the world, but still these universities seem to be weak in providing a valuable outcome. Overall, prosperity doesn't mean to access the universities. In conclusion, the rich people are not able to get educated in such places, so the wealth will not help us to get into the specific universities. While we are having enough reasons to agree to the above statement, people still ponder to show their explanations to not agree.
Despite students being rich or poor, they are unable to crack accessibility into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
.
Even though
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
disagree with the statement above, there were
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
reasons in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
. Not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
knowledge plays a vital role for grabbing access into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
a high educational-fee takes a major part of it such as the costly schools, wealthy areas.

While students are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
talented to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
admitted into the public institutions, they find it difficult to reach the level that these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
are expecting.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that the entrance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tests
are indispensable to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
an access,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are unable to crack these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tests
;
however
, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ask for
the higher grades in their bachelor's degree
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
writing the entrance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
test
, which is
unexpectedly
high. An initial analysis would be reaching the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
levels in terms of grades
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it
is calculated
as a priority. Turning to the entrance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tests
, this is the
Possible spelling mistake found.
pre-entrance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
test
in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
an admission into the college. While these points seem to be convincing, there is one more persuasive topic to cover.

On the other hand
, the cost of the study is
also
an essential component for reaching the destination,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
neither the rich
Use "nor" with neither.
or
poor were unable to afford these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
.
Even though
there were business tycoons in our society, they were
still
not ready to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
the knowledge from these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
;
however
impoverish can't even
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
about these institutions.
Moreover
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
societies, which are of cheaper cost and free, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
are under ranked in the world;
for example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
in certain countries offer free of education, and ready to take students from all over the world,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
still
these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
seem to be weak in providing a valuable outcome.
Overall
, prosperity doesn't mean to access the universities.

In conclusion
, the rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are not able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
educated in such places,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the wealth will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
into the specific
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
. While we are having
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
reasons to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
to the above statement,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
still
ponder to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
their explanations to not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Consider a situation where you are asked by your supervisor to work with one of your co-workers on a project. This co-worker has opinions that are very different than yours. Moreover, they feel very strongly about these opinions. Do you think this is a go v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
358 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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