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Computers games are becoming very popular among the

Computers games are becoming very popular among the kW558
In the modern era most of children like to play computer and mobile games and spend in numerous time on it therefore some people think that it leads to impact not only in education but also in health while I believe that playing games is beneficial up to some extent I also agree that it leads to dangerous effects on adolescents. There are a plethora of harmful effects on the development of children to commence with most of the adults and are dependent on mobile phone and computer games for instance during Covid-19 pandemic not only teenagers but also adults spend a numerous time with playing games secondly because of playing more games children do not have physical activity as a result they face the problem of obesity and also impact on behavioral problems in addition to these games such as a Blue Whale challenge due to the fact of that game people and courage to do suicides and crimes in present time people of all age group become added to play online game playing games like dream11 MPL etc. Moreover, due to this fact it directly impacts on their result and career. Because of mar playing games most of the children have specs problem on the other hand nowadays people can make their career in software development and also on a lot of money for the playing chess and Puzzle games leads to improve short term memory and also reflexes become faster. To recapitulate although there are differences in people opinion play games I strongly believe that children have to play games for merely entertainment they are to focus on their studies and career.
In the modern era most of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
like to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
computer and mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
and spend in numerous time on it
therefore
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it leads to impact not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
in education
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
in health while I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
is beneficial up to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extent I
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that it leads to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
effects on adolescents.

There are a plethora of harmful effects on the development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to commence with most of the adults and are dependent on mobile phone and computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
for instance
during Covid-19 pandemic not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
adults spend a numerous time with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
secondly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
do not have physical activity
as a result
they face the problem of obesity and
also
impact on behavioral problems
in addition
to these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
such as a Blue Whale challenge due to the fact of that game
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and courage to do suicides and crimes in present time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of all age group become
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
added
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
online game
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
like dream11 MPL etc.
Moreover
, due to this fact it
directly
impacts on their result and career.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of mar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
have specs problem
on the other hand
nowadays
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their career in software development and
also
on
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
money for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
chess and Puzzle
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
leads to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
short term memory and
also
reflexes become faster.

To recapitulate although there are differences in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
opinion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
I
strongly
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
for
merely
entertainment they are to focus on their studies and career.
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IELTS essay Computers games are becoming very popular among the

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
275 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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