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Computers and the internet are important for children's education.

Computers and the internet are important for children's education. gGQdL
These days computers and the internet is widely used for educational purpose by many organizations as it helps a student to learn on their own and track their progress. However, there are others who believe that traditional learning methods are better to teach children as children learn better in teacher-lead class. Undeniably, the popularity of using computers and the internet to educate children is increasing since the availability of the internet and affordable technology devices take place in today world. Many people are convinced that with the help of the internet and computer, the learning process becomes more flexible. Children can now learn at their own pace in their free time. Those things provide children to get a solid understanding on general topic and return a progress on how well a student understands on that topic. This can help a student to develop receptive skill but not the critical thinking skill. In order to become a better world, we need to push the children to brainstorm and use their ideas to create a unique thing. This cannot be done by the internet and computers. On the other hand, the traditional teaching methods force the children to share their ideas with each other and human teachers. This will not only allow them to share their ideas but also help them to develop their social skill. In a teacher-led class, a teacher can access a child’s both educational progress and feeling. The students need to be motivated while learning so that he can obtain the most out of a class. If the teacher finds out a student has a metal problem, the teacher can help the student to overcome his problem. As far as I am concerned, instead of trying to do a replacement on traditional teaching methods with computers and the internet, we should try to create a hybrid teaching method. In this method, the internet and computers are used to assist as a learning tool complement a traditional classroom. The combination of the technology and experienced teachers may lead us to build up a better education system for children.
These days computers and the internet is
widely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for educational purpose by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
organizations as it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
to learn on their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
track
their progress.
However
, there are others who believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
methods
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
to teach
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
in teacher-lead
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
.

Undeniably
, the popularity of using computers and the internet to educate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
is increasing since the availability of the internet and affordable technology devices take place in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
world.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are convinced
that with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
of the internet and computer, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
process becomes more flexible.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Children
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
learn at their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
pace in their free time. Those things provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a solid understanding on general topic and return
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "progress".
a progress
on how well a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
understands on that topic. This can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
to develop receptive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not the critical thinking
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
. In order to become a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
world, we need to push the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to brainstorm and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
to create a unique thing. This cannot
be done
by the internet and computers.

On the other hand
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
teaching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
methods
force the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to share their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
with each other and human
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
. This will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
them to share their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
them to develop their social
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
. In a teacher-led
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher
can access a child’s both educational progress and feeling. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
need to
be motivated
while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that he can obtain the most out of a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
. If the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher
finds out a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
has a metal problem, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
to overcome his problem.

As far as I
am concerned
,
instead
of trying to do a replacement on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
teaching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
methods
with computers and the internet, we should try to create a hybrid teaching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
method
. In this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
method
, the internet and computers are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to assist as a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
tool complement a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
classroom. The combination of the technology and experienced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
may lead us to build up a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
education system for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
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IELTS essay Computers and the internet are important for children's education.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
349 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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