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Computer games are played by all children of different nationalities .But parents thinks that they are not very educational rather are very harmful. What do you think, write with examples.

Computer games are played by all children of different nationalities. But parents thinks that they are not very educational rather are very harmful. What do you think, write with examples. rmgp
Childhood is the most crucial phase of human life where parents should be conscious for their upbringing. Whether to allow children to play games on electronic engines is certainly a moot issue which has major advantages for upcoming generation with minor disadvantages which will be elaborated in the upcoming paragraphs. On the one side, when technology is advanced and will be advancing all over the world, it has surely made it roots stronger in child entertainment with some positive effects. First of all, computer games involve many mindful plots such as Sudoku, chess, and puzzle which helps younger one to exercise their brain and enhances one's IQ level. Second of all, nowadays students have lots of subjects to study in schools consequently they get tired due to burden of study, may find life monotonous. Therefore, playing games in their leisure time help to get refreshed and results creative future generation. Hence, passing one's time on playing computer puzzles is useful. On the flip side, PlayStation shows few harmful effects on younger brains. Due to the excess usage of electronic games outdoor games has lost their existence. Physicals games aid juveniles to build up their physical fitness and it also helps individual to make new friends which robotic platform does not provide. Additionally, game developers are making a variety in them which sometimes include criminal games as a result the globe may have criminal minds. For example, PUBG a Chinese online adventure pass time which teach little one to use majority of dangerous equipment to save themselves from opponents a subsequently junior try to mirror it in life. Thus, apparatus games have little drawbacks which cannot be brush aside. To summarize, I would say that although usage of digital games is controversial because of it's some helpful and harmful effects. Yet, IT engineers and game advance should make games which help little brains to develop an innovative mind which should also help individual to strengthen their physics. Computer games are played by all children of different nationalities. But parents thinks that they are not very educational rather are very harmful. What do you think, write with examples.
Childhood is the most crucial phase of human life where parents should be conscious for their upbringing. Whether to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
children to play
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
on electronic engines is
certainly
a moot issue which has major advantages for upcoming generation with minor disadvantages which will
be elaborated
in the upcoming paragraphs.

On the one side, when technology
is advanced
and will be advancing all over the world, it has
surely
made it roots stronger in child entertainment with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effects.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
involve
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
mindful plots such as Sudoku, chess, and puzzle which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
younger one to exercise their brain and enhances one's IQ level. Second of all, nowadays students have lots of subjects to study in schools
consequently
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
tired due to burden of study, may find life monotonous.
Therefore
, playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
in their leisure time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
refreshed and results creative future generation.
Hence
, passing one's time on playing computer puzzles is useful.

On the flip side, PlayStation
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
few harmful effects on younger brains. Due to the excess usage of electronic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
outdoor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
has lost their existence. Physicals
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
aid juveniles to build up their physical fitness and it
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
individual to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
new friends which robotic platform does not provide.
Additionally
, game developers are making a variety in them which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
include criminal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
as a result
the globe may have criminal minds.
For example
, PUBG a Chinese online adventure pass time which teach
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
one to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
It seems that an article is missing.
majority of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
equipment to save themselves from opponents a
subsequently
junior try to mirror it in life.
Thus
, apparatus
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
drawbacks which cannot be brush aside.

To summarize
, I would say that although usage of digital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
is controversial
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of it's
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
helpful and harmful effects.
Yet
, IT engineers and game advance should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
brains to develop an innovative mind which should
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
individual to strengthen their physics. Computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
are played
by all children of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
nationalities.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
parents
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thinks
that they are not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
educational
rather
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
harmful. What do you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
, write with examples.

IELTS essay Computer games are played by all children of different nationalities. But parents thinks that they are not very educational rather are very harmful. What do you think, write with examples.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
356 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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