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Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. On the other hand, other people think that getting experience and developing soft skills is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. On the other hand, other people think that getting experience and developing soft skills is more important. bJ8P
A lot of people propose that being a graduate of the university can guarantee you a high-paid job. But another opinion is, grabbing more experience and developing communication skills are more valuable for a wealthy job. I consider that both of them are essential for a bright future, however, it directly depends on the type of job. On a one hand, completing college is a basic requirement for the majority of employers. It means having at least a bachelor's degree plays a significant role during employment. To be more precise, without higher education, the chances to get a high-paid job will definitely decrease. Only 1-2 % can succeed without higher education, only owing to hard work, structured business plan, and fortune. A clear example of this is Bill Gates. At age of 18, he quit university, to concentrate on his own business. However, he only took a sabbatical, in case if his entrepreneurship fail. On other hand, improving soft skills are vital for entrepreneurship and business. More specifically, when you making new acquaintances and gaining experience as much as u can, it really helps to handle a hard job. For instance, when an employee gives you a difficult task, without experience and understanding, it will be much harder to do. From my point of view, if you developed both of them, it really simplifies finding a high-paid job. Otherwise, you will encounter problems. Because, for employers, it's arduous to hire staff, that has certain knowledge in his area and also have some communication skills. There is plenty of examples, when a diligent student in university, faces misunderstandings while interacting with society. Same situation with an employee, who doesn't have enough knowledge to deal with the task. To conclude, each student should develop soft skills during studying in university. In case of hiring to a good job, it will simplify completion majority of tasks.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
A lot of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
propose that being a graduate of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
can guarantee you a high-paid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
another opinion is, grabbing more experience and developing communication
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
are more valuable for a wealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
. I consider that both of them are essential for a bright future,
however
, it
directly
depends on the type of job.

On a one hand, completing college is a basic requirement for the majority of employers. It means having at least a bachelor's degree plays a significant role during employment. To be more precise, without higher education, the chances to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a high-paid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
will definitely decrease.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Only
1-2 % can succeed without higher education,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
owing to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
work, structured business plan, and fortune. A
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
example of this is Bill Gates. At age of 18, he quit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
, to concentrate on his
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
business.
However
, he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
took a sabbatical, in case if his entrepreneurship fail.

On other hand, improving soft
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
are vital for entrepreneurship and business. More
specifically
, when
Did you mean "you're making", "you are making", or "you were making"?
you making
new acquaintances and gaining experience as much as u can, it
really
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to handle a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
.
For instance
, when an employee gives you a difficult task, without experience and understanding, it will be much harder to do.

From my point of view, if you developed both of them, it
really
simplifies finding a high-paid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
.
Otherwise
, you will encounter problems.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
, for employers, it's arduous to hire staff, that has certain knowledge in his area and
also
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
communication
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
. There is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of examples, when a diligent student in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
, faces misunderstandings while interacting with society. Same situation with an employee, who doesn't have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
knowledge to deal with the task.

To conclude
, each student should develop soft
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
during studying in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
. In case of hiring to a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
, it will simplify completion majority of tasks.
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IELTS essay Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. On the other hand, other people think that getting experience and developing soft skills is more important.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
313 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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