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You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic. Write at least 250 words. Communication between family members has decreased in recent times. Do you agree or disagree?

Communication between family members has decreased in recent times. wMnad
It is argued communication of family members has decreased in nowadays. I completely agree with this opinion. Think that our communication has decreased depends parent’s circumstances and technology development. At the beginning of the period parents very busy and they not have enough time to talk their children. Parents need to earn much money for their children, mostly family parent usually go their work at 8: 00 am then ends at 6: 00, after work they faced with traffic jam and some stressful things then they very exhausted no time to care their children. For example, Robert and Jessica have a 2 son, Robert works at company he works overtime work on weekend so she don’t have a any rest, about Jessica, she is a teacher and she works all day in school, on weekend she cleaning home and washing clothes, so Robert and Jessica really don’t have time to care their 2 som. Overall this is happened every average family and this is the big problem. Secondly technology development is a big reason to decrease communication of family members. Everything is being changed online, family members usually spends leisure time with smartphone, laptop or TV. Parents came to home then they watching tv or checking phone whereas children playing computer games or using applications. Basically this is the effect of social and every family need to talk face to face each others. At the end of the period to conclude, communication between family members has decreased in recent times depends parents busy work and spend time with smartphone.
It
is argued
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
members
has decreased
nowadays is used without 'in'. Use simply: "nowadays".
in nowadays
. I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this opinion.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Think
that our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
has decreased
The verb 'to depend' requires the preposition '(up)on': "depends on".
depends
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parent’s
circumstances and technology development.

At the beginning of the period
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
busy and
they not have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to talk their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Parents
need to earn much money for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
,
mostly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parent
usually
go their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
at 8: 00 am then ends at 6: 00, after
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
they faced with traffic jam and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
stressful things then they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
exhausted no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to care their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
For example
, Robert and Jessica have a 2 son, Robert works at
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
he works overtime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
on weekend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
she
The pronoun 'she' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "doesn’t", "didn’t".
don’t
have
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
any rest, about Jessica, she is a
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
teacher and
she works all day in school, on weekend
Did you mean "she's cleaning", "she is cleaning", or "she was cleaning"?
she cleaning
home and washing clothes,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
Robert and Jessica
really
don’t have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to care their 2
Possible spelling mistake found.
som
.
Overall
this
is happened
every average
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
and this is the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
problem.

Secondly
technology development is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
reason to decrease
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
members
. Everything is being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
online,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
members
usually
spends leisure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with smartphone, laptop or TV.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Parents
came to home then
Did you mean "they're watching", "they are watching", or "they were watching"?
they watching
Possible spelling mistake found.
tv
or checking phone whereas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
playing computer games or using applications.
Basically
this is the effect of social and every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
need to talk face to face each
The noun should be probably in the singular form: "other"?
others
.

At the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the period
to conclude
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
members
has decreased in recent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
The verb 'to depend' requires the preposition '(up)on': "depends on".
depends
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
busy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with smartphone.
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IELTS essay Communication between family members has decreased in recent times.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
259 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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