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City and suburban transportation system does not meet the needs of commuters who come to work in the city and needs to be changed To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement v.1

City and suburban transportation system does not meet the needs of commuters who come to work in the city and needs to be changed with this statement v. 1
A multitude of humans affirm that females make the best guardians than males and that is the reason they have a crucial part in the upbringing of a child in many communities. While, the other schools of thoughts deem that the father also plays same parental role like a mother. I think that woman's contribution is important in the nurturing and an effective communication of the baby, but men also teach him, how to survive in the world. Undoubtedly, no one can deny the efforts, which mothers do for their offsprings. The ladies have innately sensitive and they are competent in nurturing an infant. Because they are doing the same things with their dolls and most of them learn this from their mothers, and raising their siblings. Furthermore, they have a tendency to grasp the mind of a child, which allow them to communicate effectively with him, which cannot be done by their sex-partners. For instance, a standardized test conducted in which guardians gave them a task to comprehend the gestures of their children, females easily won against their opposite gender. Therefore, girls prove to be better at parenting in case of verbal communication and rearing. Nevertheless, other people claim that a male contribution is also profound in bringing an Infant. He educates them, how to spend his time on studies, indoor and outdoor games, and make him a well disciplined citizen. Also, father is a personality, who is strict in nature, that prohibits him to avoid from the crime. To conclude, women have an imperative role in the upbringing of a child, which create a strong bonding between them, which increase the confidence level and emotional stability. However, fathers aid him financially and teach, how to support his family in the future.
A multitude of humans affirm that females
make
the best guardians than males and
that is
the reason they have a crucial part in the upbringing of a child in
many
communities.
While
, the other schools of thoughts deem that the father
also
plays same parental role like a mother. I
think
that woman's contribution is
important
in the nurturing and an effective communication of the baby,
but
men
also
teach him, how to survive in the world.

Undoubtedly
, no one can deny the efforts, which mothers do for their
offsprings
. The ladies have
innately
sensitive and
they are competent in nurturing an infant.
Because
they are doing the same things with their dolls and most of them learn this from their mothers, and raising their siblings.
Furthermore
, they have a tendency to grasp the mind of a child, which
allow
them to communicate
effectively
with him, which cannot
be done
by their sex-partners.
For instance
, a standardized
test
conducted in which guardians gave them a task to comprehend the gestures of their children, females
easily
won against their opposite gender.
Therefore
, girls prove to be better at parenting in case of verbal communication and rearing.

Nevertheless
, other
people
claim that a male contribution is
also
profound in bringing an Infant. He educates them, how to spend his time on studies, indoor and outdoor games, and
make
him a
well disciplined
citizen.
Also
, father is a personality, who is strict in nature, that prohibits him to avoid from the crime.

To conclude
, women have an imperative role in the upbringing of a child, which create a strong bonding between them, which increase the confidence level and emotional stability.
However
, fathers aid him
financially
and teach, how to support his family in the future.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his own language, that goes to his heart.
Nelson Mandela

IELTS essay City and suburban transportation system does not meet the needs of commuters who come to work in the city and needs to be changed with this statement v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
293 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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