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Choose whether you agree or disagree with this statement and discuss why you chose that position. Support your point of view with details from your own experiences, observations or reading.

Choose whether you agree or disagree with this statement and discuss why you chose that position. Support your point of view with details from your own experiences, observations or reading. kYW8d
The media is responsible for the way we receive information from all around the world. Some people think that the news we view should be a mixture negative current events and ones that represent a better view of humanity. In this essay, I will argue that a balance of positive and negative news items is the best option for us. As human beings, we need a positive view of ourselves portrayed in the media. We need to see models of good human behaviour so that we can emulate the behaviour in accordance with our value systems. For example, displaying humans treating each other with kindness and respect may lead to an audience acting on these positive ideas. By reporting positive news stories we may build a more resilient and robust society. Bad news is often a record of the violent and dangerous behaviour and actions that are occurring around the world minute by minute. It is a realistic display of the way humans treat each other and showing it on the news reminds us of the dangers that many people face every day. For example, continuing wars, political turmoil, incurable diseases, natural disasters are events that are constantly present. If we are to solve these problems, we need to be constantly reminded that they exist. This essay has argued that a realistic portrayal of world events may be necessary to remind us daily of the ongoing problems many humans face but presenting examples of positive solutions may bring about a positive change in our society more effectively. In my opinion, the balance of television news should good rather than bad to be more reflective of current events and more effective in moulding society.
The media
You should probably use: "are".
is
responsible for the way we receive information from all around the world.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
we view should be a mixture
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
and ones that represent a better view of humanity. In this essay, I will argue that a balance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
positive
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
items is the best option for us.

As
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
beings, we need a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
positive
view of ourselves portrayed in the media. We need to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
models of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that we can emulate the
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
in accordance with our value systems.
For example
, displaying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
treating each other with kindness and respect may lead to an audience acting on these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
positive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
. By reporting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
positive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
stories we may build a more resilient and robust society.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Bad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
a record of the violent and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
and actions that are occurring around the world minute by minute. It is a realistic display of the way
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
treat each other and showing it on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
reminds us of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
dangers
that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
face every day.
For example
, continuing wars, political turmoil, incurable diseases, natural disasters are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
that are
constantly
present. If we are to solve these problems, we need to be
constantly
reminded that they exist.

This essay has argued that a realistic portrayal of world
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
may be necessary to remind us daily of the ongoing problems
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
face
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
presenting examples of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
positive
solutions may bring about a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
positive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in our society more
effectively
. In my opinion, the balance of television
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
rather
than
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
to be more reflective of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
and more effective in
Possible spelling mistake. 'moulding' is British English.
moulding
society.
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IELTS essay Choose whether you agree or disagree with this statement and discuss why you chose that position. Support your point of view with details from your own experiences, observations or reading.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
283 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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