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Children who are brought up in families that do not have large amounts of money are better prepared to deal with the problems of adult life than children brought up by wealthy parents. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

The opinion, "Children who are brought up in families that do not have large amounts of money are better prepared to deal with the problems of adult life than children brought up by wealthy parents" is accurate from every aspect. The reason why I say it is 'accurate' is because I have encountered many children of that kind. Ever since I was in the third grade, my mother always tried explaining the value of money to me because she being a single parent, could not afford everything I desired. This understanding between us grew stronger and nurtured me throughout my life in school. There was a time when one of my close friend from my dormitory, spent all her pocket money on new clothes rather than saving it for her daily necessities that include--stationery and snacks. Elizabeth came running to me, and tried persuading me to purchase some amenities for her. After throwing a dramatic tantrum, she yelled at the teachers for not providing her with enough money which subsequently lead towards a one-week suspension. I immediately realised how important composure was, after witnessing my dorm-mate's behaviour. Thus, would conclude that the right upbringing of a child is mandatory, be it a child from a rich family or a middle class family, the right conduct in society is universally accepted for a bright future.
The opinion,
"
Children who
are brought
up in families that do not have large amounts of
money
are better prepared to deal with the problems of adult life than children brought up by wealthy parents
"
is accurate from every aspect. The reason why I say it is 'accurate' is
because
I have encountered
many
children of that kind.

Ever since I was in the third grade, my mother always tried explaining the value of
money
to me
because
she
being
a single parent, could not afford everything I desired. This understanding between us grew stronger and nurtured me throughout my life in school. There was a time when one of my close friend from my dormitory, spent all her pocket
money
on new clothes
rather
than saving it for her daily necessities that include--stationery and snacks. Elizabeth came running to me, and tried persuading me to
purchase
some
amenities for her. After throwing a dramatic tantrum, she yelled at the teachers for not providing her with
enough
money
which
subsequently
lead towards a one-week suspension.

I immediately
realised
how
important
composure was, after witnessing my dorm-mate's
behaviour
.
Thus
, would conclude that the right upbringing of a child is mandatory, be it a child from a rich family or a middle
class
family, the right conduct in society is
universally
accepted
for a bright future.
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IELTS essay Children who are brought up in families that do not have large amounts of money are better prepared to deal with the problems of adult life than children brought up by wealthy parents. with this opinion?

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
224 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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