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Children today find it’s difficult to concentrate or pay attention in schools. Why do you think causes this problem? What do we need to do to solve this problem?

Children today find it’s difficult to concentrate or pay attention in schools. Why do you think causes this problem? What do we need to do to solve this problem? 15oWy
It is not uncommon to hear the complaint that children nowadays are easily distracted from what they are supposed to do in class. The factors responsible for this problem and feasible solutions accordingly will be analyzed in this report. Among all the possible reasons，the excessive application of electronic products in school should bear the blame. Children born and raised in this digital age have been accustomed to keeping in touch with the outside world through their smartphones or iPad. As a result，various social media and mobile game APPs bring the world closer to them but dampen their enthusiasm for absorbing knowledge and skills. To expand their attention span in class and solve this problem，there are some measures that need to be taken into consideration. It is advisable for teachers，who usually function as monitors and managers of the class，to set rules about phone use. For example，anyone caught using electronic products for non-academic purposes more than three times will be given an “F”in the final exam. This can bring an immediate and tangible outcome within a short time. In, addition，distracting students from screens back to the whiteboard is also a way worth trying. Some activities designed for raising the energy level of students so as to get them better involved in a class can be applied wisely，like role-play，mingling， seminars etc. These kinds of activities convert the traditionally teacher-centred teaching pattern into the student-centred one and consequently compete with phones for student’s interest and attention. In conclusion，the abuse of electronic products in the classroom is the root cause of students' attention issues and the responsibility of sparing students from this problem falls on teachers.
It is not uncommon to hear the complaint that children nowadays are
easily
distracted from what they
are supposed
to do in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
. The factors responsible for this problem and feasible solutions
accordingly
will
be analyzed
in this report.

Among all the possible
The character '，' is not a standard comma, although it can look like a comma. Use "reasons, the".
reasons，the
excessive application of electronic products in school should bear the blame. Children born and raised in this digital age have
been accustomed
to keeping in touch with the outside world through their smartphones or iPad. As a
The character '，' is not a standard comma, although it can look like a comma. Use "result, various".
result，various
social media and mobile game
Possible spelling mistake found.
APPs
bring the world closer to them
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
dampen their enthusiasm for absorbing knowledge and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.

To expand their attention span in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
and solve this
The character '，' is not a standard comma, although it can look like a comma. Use "problem, there".
problem，there
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
measures that need to
be taken
into consideration. It is advisable for
The character '，' is not a standard comma, although it can look like a comma. Use "teachers, who".
teachers，who
usually
function as monitors and managers of the
The character '，' is not a standard comma, although it can look like a comma. Use "class, to".
class，to
set
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
about phone
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
. For
The character '，' is not a standard comma, although it can look like a comma. Use "example, anyone".
example，anyone
caught using electronic products for non-academic purposes more than three times will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
an “F
There should be a space after a closing quote.
”in
the final exam. This can bring an immediate and tangible outcome within a short time.

In,
The character '，' is not a standard comma, although it can look like a comma. Use "addition, distracting".
addition，distracting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
from screens back to the whiteboard is
also
a way worth trying.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
activities designed for raising the energy level of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
'So as to' expresses purpose and is used in formal texts. Consider using "to"
so as to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
them better involved in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
can
be applied
The character '，' is not a standard comma, although it can look like a comma. Use "wisely, like".
wisely，like
The character '，' is not a standard comma, although it can look like a comma. Use "role-play, mingling，".
role-play，mingling，
seminars etc. These kinds of activities convert the
traditionally
Possible spelling mistake found.
teacher-centred
teaching pattern into the
Possible spelling mistake found.
student-centred
one and
consequently
compete with phones for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student’s
interest and attention.

In
The character '，' is not a standard comma, although it can look like a comma. Use "conclusion, the".
conclusion，the
abuse of electronic products in the classroom is the root cause of students' attention issues and the responsibility of sparing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
from this problem falls on teachers.
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IELTS essay Children today find it’s difficult to concentrate or pay attention in schools. Why do you think causes this problem? What do we need to do to solve this problem?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
271 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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