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Children should be given more freedom and we should not restrict them with rules do you agree or disagree

Children should be given more freedom and we should not restrict them with rules 8d8wx
Freedom is considered a truly universal phenomenon in today's global scenario. Recent studies over the issues of freedom suggest that there is a high chance these event are to heighten in the coming years considering the current trajectory of the modern world. In this context an issue which is fast becoming a fixture of many discussions concerns to the extent to which children should be given freedom. This is a shall analyse the issue from every angle and argue that children's freedom should be restricted. In the list of arguments supporting some people's perspective that children should be given more freedom, one of the most dynamic is that freedom breeds creativity and motivation. It is not uncommon to find western countries coming up with innovative ideas by giving freedom to their children from a very young age. The proponents of this view also feels that freedom guarantees stress-free life for children and the very essence of childhood can be upheld this way. However, it would be possible to easily slash the above-mentioned arguments into shreds with reference to cultural erosions it engenders in the society. Cultural erosion in the traditional societies means people are desensitized both emotionally and morally which subsequently results in poorer lifestyle. Hence it is clear that the above-mentioned perspective fails to present itself as a comprehensive model that addresses the overall well being of all participants involved. A swift examination of the issue in hand would give as a plenitude of reasons supporting my view that children's freedom should be restricted. To begin with it can be safely assumed that such freedom often result in poor academic performance of children. It is possible that children might pursue avenues of pleasure and entertainment if given more freedom and that which could adversely affect the academic prospects. I also feel that if children are not trained to obey rules, could destabilize the society in the long term as children may disrespect symbols of authorities and the end result would be chaos and lawlessness lawlessness. Finally it wouldn't be to off the mark if I opined that children when presented with excess freedom may turn dangerous to the society as a whole as the many incidents of gun-toting western children shooting everyone in sight bear witness. Having considered both sides, it seems I was so sensible to register my disagreement to the statement that children should be given more freedom. In spite of the detailed tapestory of argument clearly placed in favour of freedom it seems so and convincing to my psyche aur subtextual basis. It is also evident that while the downsides of providing freedom of tangible, profound and enormously consequential consequential, the benefits of ephemeral, superficial and beyond a point stop to be palpable in the long run. Suffice to say that it is best to to restrict the freedom of children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Freedom
is considered
a
truly
universal phenomenon in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's global scenario. Recent studies over the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
suggest that there is a high chance these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
event
are to heighten in the coming years considering the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
trajectory of the modern world. In this context an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
which is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
becoming a fixture of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
discussions concerns to the extent to which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
. This is a shall
Possible spelling mistake. 'analyse' is British English.
analyse
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
from every angle and argue that children's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
should
be restricted
. In the list of arguments supporting
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's perspective that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
, one of the most dynamic is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
breeds creativity and motivation. It is not uncommon to find western countries coming up with innovative
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
by giving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
from a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
young age. The proponents of this view
also
feels that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
guarantees
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
-free life for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
and the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
essence of childhood can
be upheld
this way.
However
, it would be possible to
easily
slash the above-mentioned arguments into shreds with reference to cultural
Possible spelling mistake found.
erosions it
engenders in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
. Cultural erosion in the traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
societies
means
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are desensitized
both
emotionally
and
morally
which
subsequently
results in poorer lifestyle.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Hence
it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that the above-mentioned perspective fails to present itself as a comprehensive model that addresses the
overall
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
well being
of all participants involved. A swift examination of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
in hand would give as a plenitude of reasons supporting my view that children's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
should
be restricted
. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with it can be
safely
assumed that such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
result in poor academic performance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. It is possible that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
might pursue avenues of pleasure and entertainment if
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
and that which could
adversely
affect the academic prospects. I
also
feel that if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are not trained to obey
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
, could destabilize the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
in the long term as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
may disrespect symbols of authorities and the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
result would be chaos and
Possible typo: you repeated a word
lawlessness lawlessness
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Finally
it wouldn't be to off the mark if I opined that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
when presented with excess
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
may turn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
as a whole as the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
incidents of gun-toting western
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
shooting everyone in sight bear witness.

Having considered both sides, it seems I was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
sensible to register my disagreement to the statement that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
In spite of
the detailed
Possible spelling mistake found.
tapestory
of argument
clearly
placed in
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
it seems
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
and convincing to my psyche
Possible spelling mistake found.
aur
subtextual basis. It is
also
evident that while the downsides of providing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
of tangible, profound and
enormously
Possible typo: you repeated a word
consequential consequential
, the benefits of ephemeral, superficial and beyond a point
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
to be palpable in the long run. Suffice to say that it is best
Possible typo: you repeated a word
to to
restrict the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
of
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
children
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IELTS essay Children should be given more freedom and we should not restrict them with rules

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
474 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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