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children part time job

children part time job VBnOw
There are myriad ways to teach children in these days to be successful person in the future both in study and work. Controversy exists over whether for preparing for adult life, children should take part-time job. Some may hold the opinion that having a part-time job is significant channel to attain a suitable life in the future, while others adhere an opposite direction. Howevr, I would rather vote on former point of view in that not only does it improves level of knowledge, but also it enhances social communication skills. The first factor which is convincing enough to favor the former point of view is that knowledge of children will be enriched by more information through taking a part-time work. In fact, children can learn various lessons from situation in the part-time job which enable them to view the world from a different perspective. They learn how to undestand some concepts in a specific field deeply. Take a child working in business shop. He can find techniques to find new customers whom are potential to buy products from company. These activities show him how to think beyound his cultural thoughts. Child's information will be enriched through vicissitude of market which teaches him to gain knowledge from different sources. A further aspect which is worth to be mentioned here is that working in a part-time job socialize child in the work place. What is siginficant is that working in a job is far more than just working for earaning money, that is get familiar with numerous individuals which each of them is from a social nexus having different habits and personalities. A child learn how to behave in front of his boos and what to say in front of other coleagues. To illustrate more, in the hours of working, a hild can share his ideas with different workers to invigorating his interpersonal interaction. He also learn how to cooperate with people through empowering spirit of team working to accomplish some tasks against other workers. All in all, taking into account all aforementioned, we safely arrive at a conclusion that a part- time helps children to have a better social and intellectual climate. It is high time we stopped ovelooking that a part- time job no longer is a obstacle to children's success.
There are myriad ways to teach
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
in these days to be successful person in the future both in study and work. Controversy exists over whether for preparing for adult life,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
take part
-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
may
Possible agreement error - use third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: "holds".
hold
the opinion that having a part-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
is significant channel to attain a suitable life in the future, while others adhere an opposite direction.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Howevr
, I would
rather
vote on former point of view in that not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
does it
Did you mean "improve"? As 'do' is already inflected, the verb cannot also be inflected.
improves
level of knowledge,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
it enhances social communication
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.

The
first
factor which is convincing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to favor the former point of view is that knowledge of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
will
be enriched
by more information through taking a part-time work. In fact,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
various lessons from situation in the part-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
which enable them to view the world from a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
perspective. They
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
how to
Possible spelling mistake found.
undestand
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
concepts in a specific field
deeply
. Take a child
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
in business shop. He can find techniques to find new customers whom are potential to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
products from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
. These activities
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
him how to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
Possible spelling mistake found.
beyound
his cultural thoughts. Child's information will
be enriched
through vicissitude of market which teaches him to gain knowledge from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
sources.

A
further
aspect which is worth to
be mentioned
here is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
in a part-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
socialize child in the work place. What is
Possible spelling mistake found.
siginficant
is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
is far more than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
for
Possible spelling mistake found.
earaning
money,
that is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
familiar with numerous individuals which each of them is from a social nexus having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
habits and personalities. A child
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
how to behave in front of his boos and what to say in front of other
Possible spelling mistake found.
coleagues
. To illustrate more, in the hours of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
, a
Possible spelling mistake found.
hild
can share his
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
workers to invigorating his interpersonal interaction. He
also
The pronoun 'He' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "learns", "learned", "learnt".
learn
how to cooperate with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
through empowering spirit of team
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
to accomplish
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
tasks against other workers.

All in all, taking into account all aforementioned, we
safely
arrive at a conclusion that a part- time
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to have a better social and intellectual climate. It is high time we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stopped
Possible spelling mistake found.
ovelooking
that a part- time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
no longer is
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
obstacle to children's success.
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IELTS essay children part time job

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
381 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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